Before he could finish speaking, Wu Biyou kicked over a chair, stood up, and stormed out, slamming the door shut with a loud bang.
The phone was thrown into the hot pot, splashing oil everywhere. Its screen flickered several times before going completely black.
The hot pot bubbled and simmered. The entire room fell silent.
Wu Biyou’s words had come like a bolt from the blue, leaving Anping completely dazed. It took him a long while to find his voice.
“What did she mean by what she just said…?”
Mu Geshen held his teacup, his expression calm.
“Exactly what she said.”
“What?!”
“I don’t remember.” Mu Geshen shrugged. “There are gaps in my memory. I’ve lost some very important parts, and even I can’t piece together the causes and consequences of many things. According to what later generations have said, I made a mistake back then and dragged quite a few people down with me.”
“‘I have failed to repay your boundless kindness, whether in life or death, whether as teacher or friend.’” Mu Geshen took a sip of tea. “‘You can hardly remember the days when we once shared a cup of wine.’”
“Don’t talk about things that are hard to digest while we’re eating.” With that, Mu Geshen put down his teacup and fished the phone out of the spicy hot pot with his chopsticks. “This pot is ruined. Have them bring us another one.”
A fresh pot of broth was soon brought over. Anping ate without tasting anything. Mu Geshen dipped a piece of beef tripe into the broth and placed it in his bowl.
“If you want to know something, just ask. Don’t sit there looking so miserable while you’re eating. Don’t be like my unlucky daughter, keeping everything bottled up whenever something happens. With such a heavy burden on her shoulders, no wonder she never grew any taller.”
Anping picked up the beef tripe and ate it. The chili rushed straight up his nose, almost bringing tears to his eyes.
“Half-Immortal, about this matter… I still want to ask you something.”
“I know. I really have forgotten something very important.” Mu Geshen pulled out a tissue and handed it to him. “Anping, how far have you gotten in your dreams lately?”
“Chai Shuxin—ah, no, Ling Shuzi—went to stay at the Ginkgo Study for a while.”
“Then you’re getting close.” Mu Geshen calculated for a moment before saying, “Sanjiutian arrived in winter. Then, when the following spring came around, I said goodbye to Master and descended the mountain. Let me think… I was probably away for four years.”
Anping froze. “Why?”
“I went abroad to study. That was the fashion in those days.” Mu Geshen smiled. “Before I became Master’s disciple, my father had already told him that cultivating oneself was only the first step toward putting one’s family in order, governing the state, and bringing peace to the world. I came from the Mu family, after all. I couldn’t stay by Master’s side forever and fulfill my filial duties to him.”
Anping suddenly understood. “No wonder you never copied my English homework.”
“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.” Mu Geshen recited a line in English, his accent impeccably Oxford. “You might not dream about those four years, but nothing much happened during that time. There was probably only one thing worth mentioning.”
“That should have been my third year abroad. I was in Moscow at the time. My school was a kilometer away from the Neva River. It was winter when I received the letter from Second Brother, and the riverbanks were covered in snow.” Mu Geshen said, “He wrote that Master had passed away.”
Anping was so shocked that he sprang to his feet, knocking over the teacup on the table. The porcelain shattered, and tea spilled all over the floor.
“That happened many years ago. Why are you reacting so strongly, Anping?” Mu Geshen poured him another cup of tea. “Before Master passed away, he left instructions. He said I could return to China for his funeral, but once the seventh day after his death had passed, I had to leave.”
“China was thousands of miles away from Moscow. By the time I received Second Brother’s letter, the seventh day had long since passed. A master’s command cannot be disobeyed, so I didn’t return. It wasn’t until I had completed my studies that I went to bow before his grave.”
As he spoke, Mu Geshen shook his head and smiled faintly. “I, too, have wandered adrift for a long time.”
And now that I have returned, how can I bear to look back on all that has happened in my life?
I count the miles between us, yet though we are still bound by blood, how many families remain whole?
Even after Anping got home, he remained in a daze. He hurriedly washed up and went to bed, but tossed and turned, unable to fall asleep no matter what.
He didn’t understand.
When Mu Geshen had driven him home, he seemed to have noticed that Anping was troubled. He patted him on the shoulder and left him with one sentence: “It’s all in the past. It’s just a dream. Treat it like watching a movie.”
Perhaps he’d eaten too much greasy and spicy food. Anping’s throat felt terribly dry, so he got up and made himself a packet of the soothing tea Mu Geshen had given him. Since he couldn’t sleep anyway, he decided to burn the midnight oil and pulled out his schoolwork to review.
His assignments were piled up like a mountain. Studying really was a good way to escape worries and troubles. Anping took out a sheet of white paper and began drawing up a timeline of modern history.
1937 AD, the twenty-sixth year of the Republic of China.
The French Popular Front government was forced to resign, and political turmoil in France continued until the outbreak of World War II.
Yugoslavia signed a non-aggression and arbitration treaty with Italy, joining the Rome-Berlin Axis.
The Soviet Union’s total industrial output rose to first place in Europe, making it the world’s second-largest industrial power.
The German airship Hindenburg met with disaster. From then on, airships withdrew from the stage of commercial aviation.
On July 7, Japan launched its full-scale invasion of China, and the Chinese people began their nationwide war of resistance.
The night grew deeper. The second hand advanced tick by tick. As Anping stared at the page filled with black characters on white paper, a wave of drowsiness suddenly washed over him. He couldn’t help setting down his pen, intending to rest his head on the desk for a while.
The affairs of this world drift along like flowing water. Looking back, all of life seems like a fleeting dream.
“Extra! Extra! The National Defense Conference will be held on August 7!” A newsboy stood at the dock, hawking newspapers. “Get your newspaper here! Only five cents a copy!”
The harbor was one of the liveliest places in the entire city. Steamships entered the port, their whistles sounding long and clear. Passengers came and went along the gangways. Among them was a fashionable young woman dressed in the latest style, carrying a small calfskin suitcase. Her high heels clicked crisply against the ground.
The sharp-eyed newsboy hurried over to her and greeted her enthusiastically. “Miss, would you like to buy a newspaper?”
The young woman seemed to be in a hurry. She waved her hand repeatedly. “No, no! Get out of the way.”
“Just buy one! Things haven’t been very peaceful lately. Keeping up with the news might give you some peace of mind…”
“Please give me a newspaper.”
A hand suddenly reached between them. The newsboy looked up and saw a tall, slender young man wearing a linen suit and carrying a suitcase and a long-handled umbrella.
“Thank you for your patronage, sir!” The newsboy hurriedly took out a newspaper. “Five cents, please.”
“Keep the change.” The young man handed him a silver dollar, then pointed toward the flower girl not far away. “I remember that girl is your younger sister, isn’t she? Get a red camellia and give it to this young lady.” Then he smiled at the woman beside him. “It’s not easy for children to make a living at the docks. They can be a little pushy when trying to earn money. Please don’t hold it against him.”
The newsboy froze, then hurried to wrap up a camellia and handed it to the young woman. “I’m sorry, miss! Please forgive me!”
The young woman’s anger turned to delight, and her cheeks flushed slightly. She softly thanked the young man, accepted the flower, and turned to leave, trailing the fragrance of her perfume behind her.
The newsboy looked at the generous young man before him and was just about to thank him when the other suddenly raised his hand and smacked him on the head.
“It’s only been a few years, Little Fengzi. How did you become so lacking in common sense? That young lady just now was the second daughter of the shipping magnate. You offended her. Do you still want to make a living at this dock?”
Little Fengzi staggered from the slap, then looked the young man up and down in surprise. “…Who are you, sir?”
“It’s me.” The young man took off his glasses and raised an eyebrow. “It’s only been a few years. You’ve already forgotten what I look like?”
Little Fengzi froze. Then he suddenly threw himself at the young man and shouted, “The Mu family’s fourth young master?! Mu Geshen, you’re actually back!”
The two embraced. Mu Geshen was a whole head taller than him, while Little Fengzi clung to him and refused to let go.
“Brother Mu, you’re finally back… Brother, how many days has it been since you washed your hair? Why is it so greasy?”
“Get lost. That’s called hair gel.” Mu Geshen patted him on the shoulder. “I remember your family owned a tailor shop. How did you end up selling newspapers here?”
“Times are too chaotic, and business is bad. My father fell ill a while ago, too, so we had no choice but to close the shop for now. My younger sister and I came out to earn a little money to help support the family.” As he spoke, Little Fengzi sniffled. “Brother Mu, I’ve missed you so much these past few years.”
When Mu Geshen was young, he had been practically a little tyrant. Whenever he came down from the mountain, he would inevitably gather a group of friends and go looking for fun around the city. He never put on airs and could get along with anyone.
“These past few years, with you gone, the streets haven’t been nearly as much fun as they used to be. Even Brother Song hardly gets into fights with people anymore,” Little Fengzi said. “A few years ago, when the Master of the Ginkgo Study passed away, everyone went to pay their respects, but you didn’t come back then either…”
“I’m back now, aren’t I? You’re a grown man already. Stand up straight, and don’t go getting teary-eyed at the drop of a hat.” Mu Geshen set him down. “Your father is ill. Why didn’t you take him to the Chai family for treatment?”
“It’s Young Master Chai who examined him. Thanks to the Chai family’s medicine hall, otherwise my father wouldn’t have been able to afford medical treatment at all.” Little Fengzi rubbed his eyes. “Brother, how long will you be staying this time?”
“I’m not leaving again.” Mu Geshen smiled. “Brother Song is hosting a welcome-back banquet tonight. There’ll be plenty of food, enough to fill you up. Remember to bring your younger sister.”
“I’ve been mooching meals off Brother Song these past few days.” Little Fengzi scratched his head sheepishly, then asked with concern, “Brother, everyone says there’s going to be a war. Why did you come back now instead of staying overseas, where you’d be safe?”
“Listen to yourself.” Mu Geshen gave him a light slap. “Even fallen leaves return to their roots. This is my home. Was I supposed to stay away just because there’s going to be a war?”
“Brother is right.” Little Fengzi nodded repeatedly. “Then, Brother, you’re really not leaving again?”
“I’m not leaving.” Mu Geshen said, “If anything happens, don’t try to tough it out on your own. Come talk to me anytime.”
“With you saying that, there’s nothing I need to be afraid of anymore.” Little Fengzi grinned. “Brother, you just got back. Where are you planning to go? How about I show you around?”
“Get out of here. Have I become so hopeless with directions that I need a guide after just a few years away?” Mu Geshen scolded him with a laugh. “If you want to show me the way, fine. Carry your brother’s suitcase. We’re going to Guanshan Yue.”
“Got it!” Little Fengzi immediately understood. “As expected of Brother Mu, so loyal and affectionate. You’ve barely returned and you’re already rushing off to see your sweetheart!”
“What sweetheart?” Mu Geshen said casually. “Your brother is taking you to a pleasure house to listen to some music.”
Four years had passed, yet the familiar scenery remained unchanged. Guanshan Yue had even expanded by two floors. The grand hall, decorated with gilding, was filled with a faint, lingering fragrance.
During the day, the establishment did not receive clients and operated only as a teahouse. By chance, a pingtan performance had just begun when the two entered. Two female performers sat on either side of the storytelling platform, one holding a sanxian and the other cradling a pipa. In the middle sat a jade-like young gentleman, holding a white fan and performing a passage from Wenzhao Pass.
“How can I care for a thousand miles of frost and ten thousand layers of mountains—”
The pipa sounded like pearls and jade, while the young gentleman sang the story in a leisurely manner. His voice was rich and elegant, with the air of a learned scholar.
Mu Geshen asked for a private room and looked down at the hall with a smile. “The entire audience is made up of women, all here to listen to the storytelling. As expected of a famous performer. He’s so captivating that even young ladies are coming to a pleasure house to hear him perform. Truly remarkable.”
A young courtesan came over with tea, smiling. “Mr. Wu’s voice is truly one of a kind. Usually, tickets are impossible to get. Today is an early performance, so only now were we able to free up a private room. Young Master, you came at just the right time. It must be fate.”
Mu Geshen laughed aloud when he heard that. “It’s more than fate. We have several years of tangled grudges and ill-fated ties between us.”
The courtesan froze at his words, then covered her mouth with a laugh. “Young Master, are you and Mr. Wu old acquaintances?”
“I’ve seen you before. Are you one of the young ladies Aunt Zhao brought up?” Mu Geshen winked at her. “Don’t you recognize me?”
“Good grief, it would be strange if she did!” Little Fengzi interjected. “Just look at your fake foreigner getup.”
The courtesan looked the young man up and down. Suddenly, she seemed to remember something and exclaimed, “Y-You… are you Young Master Mu?!”
“I’m touched that you still remember me, sister.” Mu Geshen smiled warmly. “It’s been years since we last met. The old friends and familiar scenery are still here. Aunt Zhao’s business has clearly been flourishing. She’s even managed to get Third Brother up on stage!”
The storytelling gentleman onstage was none other than Wu Zixu.
A little over two years ago, Mu Geshen had received a letter from home while he was in Europe. Song Wentong was not one for idle chatter, and his letters had always been brief and to the point. Yet this particular letter was unusually long, spanning several pages, and contained only one piece of news: Wu Zixu had become a pingtan performer at Guanshan Yue.
The events leading up to it were not complicated. In short, Wu Zixu had been dragged to Guanshan Yue by Song Wentong to play cards, and, as expected, had lost everything. This time, however, Aunt Zhao refused to let him settle his debt with an IOU. Instead, she forcibly kept him there and pushed him onto the stage to sing a few pieces.
Wu Zixu had been blessed with an exceptional voice from birth. The moment he opened his mouth, the entire hall erupted in applause. Aunt Zhao took full advantage of the situation and made him stay at Guanshan Yue to sing until he had worked off his debt. Not only did she personally teach Wu Zixu how to warm up and train his voice, she also opened a storytelling hall for daytime performances. After only a few shows, his reputation spread far and wide. Everyone in the city knew that Guanshan Yue had a new performer, Mr. Wu, whose voice was exceptionally beautiful and whose tickets were nearly impossible to get.
It didn’t take long for him to earn enough to repay his debt, but the audience refused to leave him alone. Aunt Zhao was even forced to personally visit the Wu residence to invite him back. Wu Zixu couldn’t refuse her, and before long, he had simply continued performing. The Yin-Yang School had never paid much attention to worldly affairs, and no one in the Wu clan bothered to interfere with their young family head spending every day at a pleasure house. Over the years, his reputation only grew, and his fans gave him the title “Jade-Faced Young Lord.”
“Whose dashing young gentleman is that onstage?” Mu Geshen shook his head with a smile. “Although Second Brother told me about it long ago, seeing it with my own eyes is still quite a shock. Who could have imagined that Third Brother, who used to blush whenever he met a young lady, would become a famous performer?”
“I heard from Brother Tong a few days ago that Young Master Mu would be returning soon.” The courtesan was beaming, and she could hardly sit still. “We’re all family here, so there’s no need for you to sit upstairs. Shall I take you backstage?”
“Then I’ll trouble you, sister.” Mu Geshen stood up. “It’s been years since we last met. I should go pay my respects to Aunt Zhao.”
After Wu Zixu finished performing an entire set, he stopped playing and took a break. He lifted the curtain and walked backstage, only to find a crowd gathered in several layers around someone. Aunt Zhao’s voice was raised high with excitement.
“Oh, my dear! You’re so thoughtful! Auntie hasn’t doted on you for nothing!”
“These are some cosmetics that have recently become popular in France. I don’t know much about them, so I bought a few kinds recommended by my classmates.” A laugh came from within the crowd. “Aunt Zhao, try them first. If you like them, I’ll ask a friend to send you some more.”
Although the young man’s voice had become steadier and more mature than before, Wu Zixu knew that laugh better than anyone. His face immediately lit up, and he called out loudly, “Fourth Brother! When did you get back?”
“Third Brother! Have you finished your performance?” Mu Geshen stood up and pushed his way through the crowd. The two immediately embraced.
“Look at you!” Mu Geshen laughed heartily and patted him on the back. “A man must be judged by a fresh perspective after just three days apart. I haven’t seen you in a few years, and you’ve actually become a famous performer!”
“I’m just joining in the fun. The audience is generous with their praise, but I’m still nowhere near as good as someone with proper professional training.” Wu Zixu was so delighted that he kept talking. “When did you get back? I heard from Second Brother that you booked your ship ticket late. Wasn’t it supposed to be a few more days?”
“I was pulling his leg. If he’d known I was coming back today, he’d have been waiting at the docks to ambush me.” Mu Geshen winked. “I was in such a hurry to come hear Mr. Wu sing, after all.”
“Don’t start making fun of me the moment you get back.” Wu Zixu shoved him, then pulled him back. “There’s no time to prepare a welcome-back banquet for lunch. We’ll set up a few tables tonight so all the brothers can get together properly. Wait until I finish the next performance, then we’ll go mooch a meal off Second Brother.”
“Wonderful!” Mu Geshen clapped his hands. “I’ve been eating cold dishes every day overseas. I’ve been looking forward to coming home and eating Second Brother into poverty.”
“You’re impossible.” Wu Zixu laughed and sighed. “Second Brother will probably be so happy he won’t know what to do with himself. Even if you ask for a Manchu-Han Imperial Feast, he’d be delighted to cook it for you.” As he spoke, he gave Mu Geshen a careful once-over. “Your outfit is quite fashionable. Is it Western?”
“Don’t even get me started. Do you have any spare clothes? Lend me a set first.” Mu Geshen waved his hand. “The moment Aunt Zhao saw me, she called me a fake foreign devil.”
“Well, you do look rather affected.” Wu Zixu looked at him with a smile. “But Fourth Brother, you’ve grown quite a bit taller. I’m not sure my clothes will fit you.”
“If they don’t, we’ll have them altered!” Aunt Zhao chimed in. “Bring out that new silver-gray gown!” Then she smiled at the two of them. “That gown was just delivered a few days ago. Little Wu has a performance of The Three Smiles in a few days. It’s a fine piece with an elaborate sanxian accompaniment, and the gown will suit it perfectly. You’ve certainly lucked out, you rascal.”
“Aunt Zhao is so good to me.” Mu Geshen suddenly remembered something and asked Wu Zixu, “What are you performing in your next show?”
“Still Wenzhao Pass,” Wu Zixu replied. “What, is there something you’d like to hear?”
“Back then, when you saw me off, you sang a passage from Farewell at the Long Pavilion at the docks.” Mu Geshen answered immediately. “Now that an old friend has returned from the west, why not perform Astonished by Her Beauty?”
“Easy enough. I remember you loved The Story of the Western Wing back then.” Wu Zixu readily agreed. “Since you’re changing clothes anyway, come up onstage with me.”
“That won’t do. I’m not familiar with pingtan scripts. I only know a few lines in the Kunqu style.” Mu Geshen refused. “Everyone downstairs came to listen to storytelling. How can we just change the program at will? What if they demand refunds?”
“Don’t worry.” Aunt Zhao smiled warmly. “I’ll take responsibility. Sing to your heart’s content.”
“My dear Auntie!” Mu Geshen waved both hands repeatedly. “I’ve been overseas for so many years. I’ve forgotten all the tunes.”
“Don’t try to fool me. You even asked Second Brother to send you recordings back then,” Wu Zixu said. “Don’t think I don’t know. Back then, you and Second Brother came to Guanshan Yue every other day to listen to performances. Whenever you got in the mood, you’d go up and replace one of the young courtesans onstage. I even heard you once played the sanxian for Ling Shuzi?”
Mu Geshen said, “There’s no doubt about it. Second Brother definitely sold me out.”
“It’s a beautiful day, and we’re enjoying ourselves. If you lose the tune, I’ll cover for you.” Wu Zixu smiled and began warming up his voice. “Come along, my dear gentleman—”
Back in the day, Mu Geshen had been dubbed a spoiled young master. Although he hadn’t learned much of the traditional arts and refined pursuits at the Ginkgo Study, he had spent so much time among the pleasures of the world that he had mastered all four tones and all five musical notes.
The Master of the Ginkgo Study loved Kunqu. Every New Year and festival, he would have Mu Geshen perform a few passages, particularly from The Story of the Western Wing. He would often joke that “the entanglements of romance are debts of passion.”
After changing into the long gown, Mu Geshen and Wu Zixu divided the roles. Wu Zixu would play Zhang Sheng, while Mu Geshen would play Hongniang. They also found a young courtesan to play Yingying.
“I’m truly blessed today,” the young courtesan said with a bright smile. “To have met two handsome young gentlemen.”
The strings began, opening the performance. Yingying and Zhang Sheng met in the Buddhist hall. As she was about to leave, she cast him a fleeting glance. That single glance left him lovesick to the marrow. Zhang Sheng sang:
“Ah! Who would have thought I’d encounter a celestial beauty in this temple? I’ve stumbled upon a fated love affair from five hundred years ago!”
“Damn the heavens! The heavens refuse to make things easy for us. You leave me with no way to ease my longing. How can I possibly bear to part from you?” Hongniang spoke in her sweet, lively voice. “My lady, haven’t you stirred this man’s heart and sent his thoughts galloping wild?”
“You’ve left me dazzled, unable to find the words. My soul has already flown halfway to heaven!” Zhang Sheng twirled the folding fan in his hand. “Oh, heavens! I’m dying!”
The Astonished by Her Beauty scene wasn’t particularly long. However, once the two got into it, they lost track of time and unknowingly continued singing until noon. The audience had dispersed, but one person was still sitting in the seats. He spoke in a cool voice:
“You’ve barely returned, and the first thing you do is rush onto the stage to perform. What kind of behavior is that?”
Mu Geshen had just lifted the curtain when he heard the voice. His steps stopped, and he turned his head. The next second, he threw himself down from the stage.
“Second Brother! When did you get here?”
“I’ve been here for ages. You were so engrossed in your performance that you didn’t even recognize me.”
“That’s only because you’ve become even more beautiful. I thought some celestial beauty was sitting down there.”
“Stop talking nonsense.” Song Wentong was dressed in a long red gown. His tall, slender figure stood straight as he smacked Mu Geshen on the head. “Your hair gel is pretty good. Is it Western?”
“Stop teasing me, stop teasing me. I’ve been made fun of all morning.” Mu Geshen ran a hand through his hair. “You came at just the right time. I was just saying we should go mooch off you. What’s for lunch?”
“Wait until Third Brother comes out.” Song Wentong stood up and swept his long gown aside. “I’ll take you to eat at my restaurant.”
Song Wentong had mentioned in his letter that he had opened a hot pot restaurant called Ye Shui Zhu Hua.
He was skilled at cooking and loved spicy food. The broth he concocted was second to none. Not long after the restaurant opened, it was already so popular that getting a table was difficult. Mu Geshen could smell its rich aroma from far away.
“I remember you loved making hot pot every winter solstice. You’d stir-fry lantern chilies with old ginger and garlic, then add beef tallow. The aroma was so irresistible that even the little novice monks at White Water Temple would get up in the middle of the night and ring the bell.”
“Fifth Brother doesn’t eat spicy food, so I’ve made it less often since he arrived.” Song Wentong led them into the restaurant, all the way up to the second floor and into a private room. “Order whatever you want.”
“Whoa.” Wu Zixu laughed when he heard that. “The owner’s certainly generous.”
“You make it sound as if I’ve cheated you out of money. Who knows how many times you’ve come here to mooch off me?” Song Wentong glanced at him. “I can put up with feeding you while you’re alive, but you even bring banquets from Fengdu here.”
“Then I won’t stand on ceremony.” Mu Geshen tossed the menu aside and rolled up his sleeves. “Bring me one of everything on the menu. Don’t leave out a single dish.”
Author’s Note:
1\. “It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.” — Charles Dickens, A Tale of Two Cities.
2. “The affairs of this world drift along like flowing water. Looking back, all of life seems like a fleeting dream.” — Li Yu, Crows Crying at Night
3. Two Poems from Golden Thread Melody by Gu Zhenguan
[The First]
Ji, are you safe and well?
Even if you return, how could you bear to look back on all that has happened in your life?
On this long and lonely road, who is there to comfort you?
Your mother is old, your family poor, and your child still young.
You can hardly remember the days when we once shared a cup of wine.
You must have grown accustomed to demons and monsters attacking you,
Yet you still cannot compare with those who manipulate the world,
Turning rain into clouds and clouds into rain.
Ice and snow—
How long have you endured them?
Do not let your tears soak through your coarse clothes.
Look across the distant horizon:
How many families can still remain together, flesh and blood reunited?
Compared with those beautiful women whose lives are so often cut short,
Your fate is no better.
And now, stranded beyond the frontier,
You must endure such bitter cold.
For twenty years, like Shen Baoxu, you have kept your solemn promise.
You wait for the day when even the crows turn white and horses grow horns,
When someone will finally come to your rescue.
Keep this letter
Close to your breast.
[The Second]
I, too, have wandered for a long time.
For ten years, I have failed to repay your boundless kindness,
Whether in life or death, whether as teacher or friend.
We were once celebrated together, and I did not steal that reputation.
Just look at how thin Du Fu grew.
My suffering has been no less than his during his exile in Yelang.
A wretched fate has forced me to part forever from the one who understood me.
Tell me, in this life,
Could anything be more desolate than this?
A thousand and ten thousand grievances—
Let me lay them bare before you.
You were born in the Xinwei year, and I in the Dingchou year.
We shared only a brief span of time,
Yet frost and snow have battered us both,
Like fragile reeds and willows, prematurely withered.
From now on, you must write fewer poems and lyrics.
Save your heart and soul so that we may remain together.
All I wish for is a world where the Yellow River runs clear
And people may live long lives.
When I return, I shall hasten to revise the manuscripts
From my years of military service,
So that I may leave behind something more than an empty name.
Words cannot express it all.
Your humble friend, Guan, bows his head.