“How could I ever want you to leave!”
Qin Xiaoman immediately refuted him. “You’re the one I brought home, not some stranger forced on me.”
“I even got sick over this, hurt for days.”
Speaking sincerely, Qin Xiaoman felt Du Heng’s grip on his hand tighten.
“So if you knew your uncle came, why let me go to the county? You were thinking I’d go with him to Huizhou, weren’t you?”
Qin Xiaoman lowered his gaze. “Your uncle was right. Luoxia County is backward, and this village is even more remote. Going with him to Huizhou would give you a better future. Besides, you’ve been saving money; you wanted to leave anyway. I wanted to keep you, but I couldn’t be as domineering as I am with others. You’re a good person and have taken care of me these past days. I don’t want to hold you back for life.”
Du Heng held Xiaoman’s chilled hand. “Saving money was just to buy you a few things. I never intended to leave you. You may risk your future for me, but I can choose to stay for you instead of chasing it.”
Qin Xiaoman froze, staring at the delicate hand enclosing his own, struggling to believe that reserved, proper Du Heng would speak like this.
He had never said anything beyond propriety, no matter the circumstances.
“I’m not leaving. From now on…” Du Heng lifted Qin Xiaoman’s face so he would look at him. “I will be your husband. I’ll stay by your side forever. I wanted to tell you this when you were sick.”
Qin Xiaoman saw solemnity in Du Heng’s warm eyes, his heart skipping a beat. He quickly looked away, yet his mind urged him forward.
“You really won’t go? Huizhou is wealthy and bustling. Your uncle’s family has a large estate. If you went there without effort, you’d still have a life most people couldn’t earn in a lifetime.”
Du Heng shook his head. “I’ve come of age and I know what I want. This isn’t a hasty decision. Those things—wealth, status—they’re nothing compared to you. Besides, my uncle has already left Luoxia County. Even if I regretted it, there’s no chance to change it now.”
Qin Xiaoman couldn’t put his current feelings into words. Though joy bloomed in his heart at having Du Heng back, it didn’t show on his face; instead, it brought him to tears.
He collapsed into Du Heng’s chest, hearing someone say that leisurely, wealthy days weren’t as important as him—words that struck deep at his heart.
He had always been wary of affection, like a cat scornful of dogs, never having heard anything so heartfelt and sincere.
He buried himself in Du Heng’s embrace and cried again.
After a while, he realized he shouldn’t just cry; now was the time to make promises to Du Heng.
He was willing to give up a good life just to stay with him.
Qin Xiaoman hurriedly grasped Du Heng’s hand, ignoring the tears still on his face, swallowed, and said,
“Though three days ago, when I saw your uncle come to the village, I wanted to persuade you to stay, I thought carefully and realized that going with your uncle to Huizhou would ultimately be better for you. So I didn’t say anything. But now that you’ve stayed, I want to tell you these words.”
Du Heng nodded and wiped the tears from Xiaoman’s cheek. “I’m listening.”
“You’ve stayed, and I will take good care of you. If you want to study, I’ll support you; if you want to run a business, I’ll help just like before.”
A warmth flowed through Du Heng. “Mm. Alright.”
Seeing Du Heng agree, Qin Xiaoman sniffled and threw himself into Du Heng’s arms, burying his face and crying again. “Du Heng, you’re so good. I’ll treat you well from now on, won’t let you suffer, and I’ll make sure you have a good life…”
Watching Xiaoman cry and speak, Du Heng wrapped one arm around his shoulders, the other hand resting on the back of his head, holding him in the safest, most comforting embrace.
He rested his chin atop Xiaoman’s head, slightly amused that these were words Xiaoman should be hearing from him, yet now came from the boy himself. Still, as long as they were together, it didn’t matter.
“I know. I understand. I want you to know my feelings, too.”
He had stayed, not out of gratitude for saving his life, not because of circumstances, but because his heart was full of Xiaoman.
Perhaps Huizhou would have offered a better life, but leaving Luoxia County would have meant leaving behind a Qin Xiaoman he might never find again.
“The mountains are cold. Let’s go home.”
Du Heng held Xiaoman close, feeling him shiver slightly; his clothes had been soaked when he fell.
He could feel Xiaoman’s wet back through his clothes.
Sniffling, Qin Xiaoman nodded, wiping his face. He rarely cried in front of others, seeing it as shameful and weak, a sign for others to look down on him. But he trusted Du Heng would not think so.
“Let’s go.”
Qin Xiaoman grabbed onto Du Heng as they started down, but a sharp pain shot through his knee. Reflexively, he bent it and noticed that his pants had been scraped, and the skin on his knee was cut.
“Don’t hurt your bones. Let’s go see Dr. Cui after we get down.”
Du Heng crouched to examine the wound, already bleeding, raw and scraped. Just looking at it hurt.
Qin Xiaoman waved it off. “The bones are fine; just the skin hurts a bit.”
Just then, seeing Du Heng kneel, he said, “I’m not letting you carry me!”
Du Heng tilted his head. “How heavy can you be? You’re only a little taller than average. You could carry me before; don’t tell me I can’t carry you now. Come on, get on—don’t you want those wontons?”
Qin Xiaoman looked at Du Heng’s broad back, hesitated for a moment, but his heart was moved.
As a child, he had been too mischievous to ride on anyone’s back. His father, a scholar, wasn’t fond of such antics, so he had been carried very few times. Later, when he wanted to be carried, no one would do it.
Now, he carefully climbed onto Du Heng’s back.
He wrapped his hands around Du Heng’s shoulders, burying his head in the nape of his neck. “How is it? Heavy?”
Du Heng held Xiaoman’s long, slender legs. “Tch, it is a little heavy.”
“Nonsense. You walk so lightly; if it were heavy, you couldn’t move so fast!”
Du Heng chuckled. “You know perfectly well, yet you ask me anyway.”
Qin Xiaoman felt like his heart was soaring. Nestled against Du Heng’s back, he leaned closer to the exposed neck, fair-skinned and flushed slightly from the walk, and nuzzled up.
“What are you doing?”
Du Heng felt the warmth and softness on the back of his neck, followed by a sharp pinch, and turned to see Xiaoman biting him.
“Are you a little dog?”
Xiaoman didn’t answer, just happily snuggled against him.
By the time they reached the foot of the mountain, it was afternoon.
The New Year weather was cool, no one was napping outside, and the village was busier than his home.
Qin Xiaoman’s eyes were blurred from crying; to avoid being laughed at, he stayed pressed into Du Heng’s back.
“What happened?”
The Qin family, with three members, had returned from the county in their ox cart. From afar, they saw Du Heng carrying Qin Xiaoman down the slope.
“Second uncle,” Du Heng called.
“What happened to Xiaoman? Why didn’t anyone call for help?”
“He fell on the mountain but seems to have dozed off.”
Qin Xiong frowned. “Was it serious?”
“Just a scrape, nothing serious.”
Qin Xiong jumped off the ox cart, grumbling, “Nothing serious, yet you’re carrying him? That boy is taller than most; you could crush someone!”
Qin Xiaoman immediately blocked out his uncle’s words before he could get too close. “Second Uncle, how can you say that!”
Seeing the boy tilt his chin up at him, Qin Xiong frowned. “This kid, seeing me still pretend to sleep—who taught you that?”
Qin Xiaoman dropped his face onto Du Heng’s shoulder and said nothing.
“Why are your eyes like that? A few days ago, you ran off from your uncle’s house and didn’t tell anyone. What happened?”
For a moment, Qin Xiaoman didn’t know how to respond.
Du Heng quickly stepped in. “There was a small matter that day; we’ll talk another time. Second Uncle, we haven’t eaten yet. Let’s head back and make some food.”
“You two,” Qin Xiong muttered, sensing they might have quarreled earlier. Seeing them both unwilling to speak, he decided not to press—bringing up old matters could only sour their mood again.
He glanced at Qin Xiaoman. “Get down from Du Heng. A grown boy, looking like this—what’s the sense of it?”
Qin Xiaoman ignored him, burying his head deeper.
Du Heng chuckled. “Let’s go, Second Uncle.”
“Go ahead,” Qin Xiong replied, shaking his head. Watching them leave, he called after them, “Du Heng, don’t spoil him too much.”
Sighing, he thought back to when he had worried that Qin Xiaoman couldn’t handle Du Heng, now feeling a twinge of sympathy for the refined, gentle Du Heng.
Li Wanjv, who had been quietly riding on the ox cart, saw the couple’s closeness and rolled her eyes. She opened her mouth to tease them about their public display of affection but caught the slightly jealous look on her brother’s face and changed her tone:
“Having a husband is good—someone who knows how to care for you.”
Qin Xiaozhu replied, “Not every man knows how to care.”
“Those who pay attention will be good. Mother can have a matchmaker show you two good families—how about that?”
Qin Xiaozhu neither agreed nor refused. He wasn’t in a hurry to marry; being someone else’s wife meant more work than he wanted—serving in-laws, cooking for the household, constant chores—hardly a life as comfortable as at home.
But seeing Qin Xiaoman with a husband, their unguarded closeness made others envious. Even Qin Xiaozhu noticed that Qin Xiaoman’s once domineering temper had softened, imagining that Du Heng’s care brought even more benefits than people saw.
Growing up, his father, eldest, and second brother had all carried him, but none had inspired the same admiration as seeing Du Heng carry Qin Xiaoman now. For the first time, he felt a spark of wanting to marry someday.
Back at home, Qin Xiaoman hopped off Du Heng’s back.
“Where’s the flour and fresh meat? Let’s get the filling ready—I’m getting hungry.”
Though he had eaten a large bowl of egg custard that morning as a “farewell meal,” the thought of leaving, climbing the mountain, and crying had left his stomach still empty.
Du Heng looked at the little gray rabbit-like figure he had carried and laughed.
“The filling is ready; just need to roll the dough and make the wontons. I went to fetch you because you were taking so long.”
“Go change your wet clothes first; touching your damp coat could give you a chill.”
Qin Xiaoman nodded but went straight into the kitchen. Du Heng didn’t immediately follow, instead heading to his own room first.
He retrieved a small bundle from his drawer.
“What’s that?”
Qin Xiaoman had quietly followed, sticking close like a shadow. Du Heng motioned him over.
Curious, Qin Xiaoman approached and found a gray rabbit-fur scarf wrapped around his neck. The soft fur clung warmly to his skin.
He instinctively touched it, both delighted and surprised.
“Where did this scarf come from?”
Du Heng adjusted it, having chosen the best gray rabbit fur. Though white fur was nice, he felt gray suited Xiaoman better. Seeing it on him, the scarf framed his face and complemented his complexion.
“Last time I saw Qin Xiaozhu had a scarf like this—it looked nice and kept her warm. I thought I’d get one for you too.”
Qin Xiaoman looked up, about to say, “You used the money from your drawer for this,” but thinking about having snooped, he held back.
“Do you like it?”
Xiaoman nodded earnestly. “Yes! I love it!”
He had wanted one for a long time but never admitted it, preferring not to appear needy. Now, someone had bought something he truly liked—of course, he was thrilled.
Seeing Qin Xiaoman’s joy, Du Heng seized the moment. “Xiaoman, I’ve been thinking about what Second Uncle said. We really should handle this properly. Spring plowing hasn’t started yet, so let’s have a simple ceremony, invite the villagers for a meal, and make it official. How about that?”
“You… you mean you want to marry me?”
“Yes.”
Xiaoman’s eyes lit up. “You really want to?”
“Not just want to—I want to marry you.”
Qin Xiaoman pressed his lips together. He had thought about it for a while but had held back, not wanting to upset Du Heng. Seeing the opportunity now, he hurriedly said:
“Alright, as you wish! Tomorrow—no, this afternoon, I’ll go speak to Second Uncle about it. I won’t let you follow me without a proper status.”
Qin Xiaoman had originally thought that if Du Heng wasn’t willing, he wouldn’t hold the banquet at all. Spending the money was one thing, but having a husband as a live-in son-in-law—someone of Du Heng’s status—meant he could become the subject of village gossip.
The villagers were coarse and loquacious; they would say anything for fun. Xiaoman had grown up in such an environment, so it didn’t bother him, but Du Heng was different. He was a refined young master, and even though his family had fallen on hard times, his mother’s family in Huizhou were wealthy merchants.
Du Heng also had a thin skin—he blushed even at a casual touch, and would practically bolt the door when bathing. He couldn’t handle the village’s teasing.
But now that Du Heng had proposed it himself, Xiaoman was a hundred percent all for it.
Du Heng gave a helpless laugh and ruffled Xiaoman’s hair. “You fool. If we don’t follow proper etiquette, you’re the one who’ll lose out.”
Qin Xiaoman snuggled into the scarf around his neck, his heart full of happiness. “As long as I get to live with you, I don’t mind losing out.”
Du Heng was a serious man. He had never been in a relationship before and never expected to jump straight to marriage. One step to the finish line seemed much luckier than constantly stumbling through trial and error.
Xiaoman was sincere, pure, and passionate. Du Heng liked that, and it made him want to treat everything properly.
“I won’t let you lose out. You’ll have everything you’re due, and we’ll go through all the proper rituals.”