Chapter 44

Perhaps not expecting Zhou Ziheng to ask such a question, Xia Xiqing’s hand trembled slightly, spilling some of the clear liquor onto his leg, where it spread into a dark circle.

After a moment’s hesitation, he downed the glass of liquor in one gulp and turned to Zhou Ziheng with a slight smile.

“You’re too late.”

Zhou Ziheng knew he was avoiding the question, but he didn’t have the courage to press further. No, rather than lacking courage, he was afraid to see Xia Xiqing’s answer.

Shang Sirui seemed not to hear Zhou Ziheng’s soft question. He struggled on the edge of drunkenness and sobriety, “Huh? Huh… Next…” He struggled to sit up, swaying as he turned the wine bottle.

“Hey? It’s Xiqing~” Shang Sirui pointed at Xia Xiqing and laughed foolishly.

Xia Xiqing’s smile faded by half. Zhou Ziheng didn’t have time to speak before he heard him whisper in a tone that sounded like a warning, “Don’t ask a single question.”

Like a wounded beast marking its territory.

Having known him for so long, this was the first time he had spoken to him like this. Zhou Ziheng felt a lump in his throat and could only watch as he tilted his head back and downed another glass of strong liquor, his brows furrowed.

Shang Sirui realized belatedly, “I… I haven’t asked any questions yet…”

“Too late,” Xia Xiqing smiled at him. “I’ve already drunk it.” He had drunk the alcohol too quickly, and the spicy fumes came back up, causing Xia Xiqing to cough uncontrollably. Zhou Ziheng instinctively reached out to pat him, but Xia Xiqing dodged him sensitively.

He regretted his impulsive action.

Zhou Ziheng slowly withdrew his hand without saying a word.

Shang Sirui stubbornly sat up again, holding onto the sofa armrest. Just as he reached out for the bottle on the coffee table, he collapsed onto it, completely passed out.

“Hey, hey…” Zhou Ziheng patted Shang Siru’s hand, but the other person remained motionless, completely unconscious.

“I’m really fed up with this.” Zhou Ziheng stood up, dragged Shang Siru to the bed, and covered him with a blanket. Shang Siru’s arm stretched out, and he mumbled incoherently, “My legs hurt… I don’t want to dance…”

Idols are kind of pitiful. Zhou Ziheng sighed and heard Xia Xiqing’s unusually low voice behind him.

“I’m going back.”

Xia Xiqing lowered his head, stood up holding the armrest of the sofa, paused for a moment, and then walked toward the door.

Sure enough, he had stepped on his landmine. Zhou Ziheng also lowered his head, standing there for a moment, not knowing what to do.

I’ll go back after Xia Xiqing leaves.

That was his original plan, but suddenly he heard a thud at the entrance. Zhou Ziheng hurried over and found Xia Xiqing kneeling on the ground, facing away from him, his hands braced against the floor, breathing heavily.

“Are you okay?” Zhou Ziheng hurried over, grabbed Xia Xiqing’s arms, and placed them on his shoulders, trying to help him stand up. But Xia Xiqing had no strength left in his body, his legs felt like they were made of cotton, and he was trembling slightly.

Xia Xiqing didn’t say a word. Zhou Ziheng struggled to lift him up, turned his face to look at him, and noticed that Xia Xiqing’s eyes were slightly narrowed, his ears were bright red, and large patches of redness had spread to the side of his neck. He seemed to want to speak, his mouth half-open, his Adam’s apple gently moving, but no sound came out.

This was completely different from the last time he had been drunk. Zhou Ziheng worriedly carried him into Shang Siru’s room and closed the door with his foot. Fortunately, Xia Xiqing lived across the hall, saving them a lot of trouble.

The aftereffects of the vodka were stronger than he had imagined. Zhou Ziheng had only had one drink, but the dizziness was overwhelming. The corridor lights blurred into one hazy circle after another, obscuring his vision. Xia Xiqing was slumped against him, his body burning hot.

He had to open the door for him. Zhou Ziheng had Xia Xiqing lean against the door, holding his shoulders, but Xia Xiqing couldn’t stand up. Before Zhou Ziheng could reach into his pants pocket, Xia Xiqing lowered his head and slid down the door, almost sitting on the ground. Zhou Ziheng sighed, helplessly lifting him up, one hand reaching under his arm, facing him, supporting his back, the other hand reaching into his pants pocket to feel for the room key.

Xia Xiqing seemed to still have some awareness; he also reached into his pocket and gripped Zhou Ziheng’s index finger.

“Hey…”

“Got it.” Xia Xiqing suddenly collapsed onto Zhou Ziheng’s shoulder, smiling dreamily.

Zhou Ziheng was a bit stunned, unsure if he had been infected by this person’s unusual heat, but his ears began to burn rapidly.

He found the room key and finally opened the door. Afraid that Xia Xiqing would fall backward against the door, Zhou Ziheng half-carried him, awkwardly kicking the door open with his foot, and managed to get this drunken fool into the room.

The hand that had just grabbed his index finger now wrapped around his neck, the fingers burning hot but clinging tightly to his skin, refusing to let go, as if trying to transfer all the heat to the innocent man.

Zhou Ziheng struggled to get Xia Xiqing onto the bed, intending to treat him the same way he had treated the drunk Shang Sui. But as soon as Xia Xiqing was placed on the bed, he rolled over, trying to get down.

“What are you doing?”

“Taking a… bath…” His voice had changed, as if scorched by strong alcohol, transforming from light, floating clouds into clear, flowing sand at the bottom of water.

Zhou Ziheng saw him get up and fall back to the ground, unable to contain his frustration. “What kind of bath are you talking about when you’re this drunk?” He was about to pull him up when he heard Xia Xiqing stubbornly mutter under his breath, “I just want to take a bath…”

What kind of karma had he accumulated? Zhou Ziheng helplessly picked up Xia Xiqing and brought him into the bathroom. Xia Xiqing clung to him like a seriously ill feline, refusing to let go, causing Zhou Ziheng’s heart to race.

“Go ahead and wash,” he said, placing Xia Xiqing on the bathroom floor. Xia Xiqing forced his eyes open wide, as if to confirm that he was indeed in the bathroom, then began to take off his shirt. The alcohol had numbed his limbs, making even the simplest movements slow and clumsy. Zhou Ziheng stood by, watching his own gray-blue shirt get stuck on Xia Xiqing’s head, unable to come off, feeling both pity and amusement.

So even that cunning and malicious person could be so clumsy at times.

Driven by this unhealthy mindset, Zhou Ziheng knelt down and helped him take off his shirt like he was taking care of a child, then threw it onto the floor outside.

This was the first time he had ever helped someone take off their clothes. Zhou Ziheng dared not look at him, even though they were both men.

Feeling a chill, Xia Xiqing’s eyelashes fluttered slowly. He looked down at his naked body, then raised his head to look at Zhou Ziheng, his eyes hazy and confused.

“Why… why did you take off my clothes…”

This guy must be crazy. Zhou Ziheng rolled his eyes so hard they almost popped out.

“You can play by yourself here. I’m not staying.” Just as he was about to stand up, Xia Xiqing pulled him back, causing him to sit down on the floor instead of standing up.

“It’s so cold…” Xia Xiqing looked at him with a pouting expression.

This person had always had the face of a delicate, fragile young beauty. His usual carefree, reckless, and heartless demeanor had masked the softness of his appearance, but now he was using that face to make a submissive expression toward Zhou Ziheng.

There was no way to refuse, so he might as well just surrender.

“I give up,” Zhou Ziheng stretched his arm backward, turned his head toward the bathroom door, and tried to reach for the shirt he had thrown out earlier, asking as he reached, “So you’re not going to take a shower?”

Before Xia Xiqing could respond, he suddenly felt something crawl under his shirt. He turned around in surprise to see Xia Xiqing had lifted his shirt and stuck his head inside, his two burning hands wrapped around his waist.

“Hey!” Zhou Ziheng grabbed his waist and pulled him out, saying, “Stop acting like a drunk.”

But Xia Xiqing refused to come out. Zhou Ziheng could feel his scorching cheeks pressed tightly against his chest, making his already irregular heartbeat even more erratic.

“It’s so cold…” Xia Xiqing, clinging tightly to him and refusing to let go, let out a muffled sigh against his chest.

Zhou Ziheng was truly at a loss; this couldn’t go on. Who would have thought that Xia Xiqing had so many tricks up his sleeve when he was drunk?

He had originally planned to pick Xia Xiqing up horizontally, but with him wrapped around his back like this, it was impossible to do so. Zhou Ziheng could only maintain this position, holding him like a child, wrapping his long legs around his waist, one hand supporting his back, and the other securing his thigh.

Xia Xiqing had turned into a koala bear that liked to crawl into his owner’s clothes, being carried out of the bathroom by his owner and brought back to the bed for the second time. As soon as Zhou Ziheng put him down, Xia Xiqing panicked. The world was spinning before his eyes, and he didn’t manage to grab Zhou Ziheng on the first try. He reached out again and happened to grab Zhou Ziheng’s waistband, clinging tightly and refusing to let go.

Zhou Ziheng was nearly driven to desperation. He hadn’t intended to leave, but this fellow had immediately grabbed his pants, almost pulling them off. He frantically grabbed Xia Xiqing’s hand, and Xia Xiqing finally realized he hadn’t left. Dazed, he climbed up and hugged his waist.

“Don’t leave…”

One moment he wanted to take a shower, the next he was afraid of the cold, and now he didn’t want him to leave. The problem was that Xia Xiqing was hugging his waist, but his hands were in the wrong place, making Zhou Ziheng’s face turn red and white, his mind in a jumble. He sat on the bed, exerted some force to grab his hand, and forcibly pulled Xia Xiqing away, “Snap out of it.”

Not only was his mind muddled, but his eyelids felt heavy. He slowly raised his eyes, his lashes trembling. Those eyes, filled with moisture, seemed to be looking at him yet not looking at him. His lips, as red as his ears from the alcohol, stubbornly pressed together. After a long moment, he finally let go.

His voice trembled.

“Can’t I stay… I don’t want to be alone…” Xia Xiqing lowered his head, speaking with great difficulty, each word draining his strength.

Zhou Ziheng stared at him in shock. In the silence, he heard the sound of water droplets falling, one by one, spreading out on the white blanket covering his legs, the water stains spreading and turning gray.

“Why are you crying?” Zhou Ziheng panicked. He had never imagined Xia Xiqing would cry. He reached out to hold Xia Xiqing’s chin, and as he lifted it, he saw his face covered in tears. The tears glistened like a soft, precious silk, thin as a cicada’s wing, covering his face.

His eyelashes were covered in tiny droplets of tears too fine to fall, glistening like fragments of stars under the light.

Xia Xiqing clung to Zhou Ziheng’s neck, crying silently. For some reason, he cried without making a sound, but Zhou Ziheng could feel his shoulders soaked through with tears. Unable to resist, he reached out and embraced his back.

“Don’t cry.” Zhou Ziheng gently stroked his protruding spine, then raised his hand to rub the back of his neck. As the youngest child in the family, he had never had any experience comforting others, so he could only rely on his instincts to soothe Xia Xiqing’s emotions.

To be honest, he was panicking. He had never seen Xia Xiqing like this before.

Xia Xiqing’s tears still hadn’t stopped. His voice was nasal, soft, and sticky, like a child’s.

“I don’t want to stay here alone…” His hands clutched Zhou Ziheng’s back tightly, as if using all his strength. “It’s so dark here… I’m scared…”

Zhou Ziheng felt a sharp pain in his heart, as if Xia Xiqing’s hands were not gripping his skin but his very heart.

Xia Xiqing refused to lift his head, clinging stubbornly to him, his tone both defiant and heartbreaking, “No! There’s no light here… and no one… I’m going to die… I’m trapped…” He suddenly began to breathe heavily, struggling out of Zhou Ziheng’s embrace, lowering his head to grab Zhou Ziheng’s right hand, and randomly pressing it against his side.

“It hurts so much here…” Xia Xiqing looked up at him, his reddened eyes brimming with tears.

For the first time in twenty years, Zhou Ziheng felt such sadness in his heart. He looked anxiously at the place where Xia Xiqing was holding his hand. “Where does it hurt?”

When he moved his hand away, he finally noticed a raised scar from a knife wound. It wasn’t long, but it looked deep, standing out starkly and terrifyingly against his fair skin.

Xia Xiqing gasped painfully, his black hair damp with tears clinging to his cheeks, and his lips red and moist. He looked like a vibrant fish on the brink of death.

“Save me… I don’t want to die…” he gasped desperately, “There’s so much blood… I want to take a shower… I don’t want to go to the hospital…”

Zhou Ziheng regretted it deeply. Why had he asked that question? If it weren’t for his momentary curiosity, perhaps Xia Xiqing would never have recalled these events. He felt as though he had torn open Xia Xiqing’s scab, and now he could only watch the wound bleed profusely, with no way to stop it.

“You won’t die.” Zhou Ziheng held him tightly in his arms. “I’m here. You’re not alone.”

“Mom…”

His voice was so weak that Zhou Ziheng even thought it was a hallucination.

“Don’t lock me up here… please…” Xia Xiqing begged intermittently, like a child who had done something wrong.

“I’ll be good… please don’t kill me…”

Kill me…

He suddenly thought of the scar on his waist.

How could this be?!

Just these few words were enough to send chills down Zhou Ziheng’s spine. He couldn’t imagine what Xia Xiqing had gone through in his childhood. He kept begging, explaining, pleading not to be locked up, saying he was cold, saying he was afraid, saying he wanted to get out.

Zhou Ziheng, with red eyes, held him tightly and repeated the same words over and over in his ear.

“Don’t be afraid, I’m here.”

Until Xia Xiqing’s tears finally dried up, and he no longer had the strength to beg for mercy, he fell asleep in his arms as if he were dead.

Zhou Ziheng suddenly felt afraid.

Over the past twenty years, he had never felt so panicked. He even reached out to check Xia Xiqing’s breath, and only after confirming that he was indeed just asleep did his racing heart gradually return to normal.

He was just asleep.

He had finally fallen asleep.

Zhou Ziheng gently laid him on the bed, watching him curl up into the soft white sheets, but his hand still clutched Zhou Ziheng’s tightly. Whenever Zhou Ziheng tried to pull away, his eyebrows furrowed in his sleep.

At that moment, Xia Xiqing resembled a dying kitten. After a night had passed, he might never wake up again.

The sound of Xia Xiqing’s hoarse cries for help still echoed in his ears.

“Don’t leave me here alone.”

Zhou Ziheng ultimately stayed, lying down beside him. He could barely close his eyes, simply watching Xia Xiqing curled up beside him, occasionally brushing his hair aside with his hand.

His eyes, swollen from crying too long, had thin upper eyelids that were almost transparent, slightly puffed up, revealing the faint veins beneath. His eyelashes were so long, longer than any female actress he had worked with before, trembling gently in his dreams, just like when he was crying, exuding an indelible sense of vulnerability.

The hand that had been brushing his hair couldn’t help but move downward, gently touching the tips of his eyelashes. This caused him to furrow his brows slightly, as if he were about to wake up, but he only burrowed closer to Zhou Ziheng.

The distance between them suddenly closed, his arm almost touching Xia Xiqing’s still-warm skin.

Xia Xiqing, who had once again sunk into sleep, tilted his face slightly upward, as if breathing would be easier that way. His gaze involuntarily fell upon it—his nose, red from crying, made the small mole there seem even more pitiful. Zhou Ziheng’s suspended hand paused, and his index finger finally gently touched his nose.

It was too light, like a dragonfly skimming the water, causing ripples only in his own heart. The ripples spread out in circles, reaching as far as the tips of his nerves, until he couldn’t help but lower his lips.

Finally, he kissed that cool nose tip, that mole that had tempted him countless times to do just that. He had finally done it, without Xia Xiqing knowing.

It was神奇, as if he had stolen that tiny mole and hidden it in some secret corner of his left ventricle. The sense of fulfillment was unlike anything he had ever experienced before—the pleasure mingled with pain was so captivating.

Just keep it for one night, and return it to him first thing in the morning.