Ren Yi poured Gong Yingxian a glass of water, then quietly stayed by his side.
The two of them were still in the interrogation room. Gong Yingxian sat in the chair in silence for a long time. The disposable paper cup made his hand look especially large, yet Ren Yi could clearly see, within that large body, a small shadow hidden deep inside—a shadow that had never truly emerged in eighteen years.
Gong Yingxian stiffly raised his hand, as though only then realizing that he was holding a cup. He set it on the table, took a deep breath, and said in a muffled voice, “Why do you always see me like this?” In front of everyone else, he was always calm and composed. Only in front of Ren Yi, for one reason or another, did he lose control again and again.
Ren Yi comforted him in a warm, gentle voice. “Because we’re friends. Friends show each other different sides of themselves.”
“Is that so…” Gong Yingxian ran a hand through the bangs over his forehead. The damp strands of hair clung to his head, exposing a large expanse of smooth forehead. “Do you have a lot of questions you want to ask me?”
“If you want to talk, I’m willing to listen. But I won’t force you.”
Gong Yingxian looked up at Ren Yi, his eyes somewhat hollow. “I became a police officer to find the person who killed my parents and my sister.”
Ren Yi nodded. “I guessed.”
“I only have a little over a year left.” Gong Yingxian’s voice trembled. “The twenty-year statute of limitations is about to expire, yet I don’t even have a single person I can bring charges against.”
Looking at the unmistakable pain in Gong Yingxian’s eyes, Ren Yi’s heart was filled with sorrow as well. Back then, he had been only six years old, too young to remember much, yet he had spent all these years chasing clues from eighteen years ago. How difficult must that have been?
“All these years, Yan-jie and I collected every piece of evidence we could find, but the trail still went cold.” Gong Yingxian clenched his fists. “But just now, that man said something he had no way of knowing.”
“He probably isn’t the killer. The age doesn’t match.”
“He isn’t, but he might know who is.” Gong Yingxian gritted his teeth, his expression twisted with rage. “The killer is still alive. He’s still alive!”
Ren Yi said solemnly, “What can I do to help you?”
Gong Yingxian stared at Ren Yi, a misty light flickering in his deep eyes. “…My mind is a mess right now. I don’t know.”
Ren Yi patted him on the shoulder. “It’s okay. I’ll wait until you’ve sorted out your thoughts. Maybe I really can help.”
He was planning to go home and ask his father whether he remembered that fire. If they wanted to find clues that had been buried for eighteen whole years, no one was more likely to know something than the people who had been there at the time. It was just that, given the state of his father’s memory, he might not remember anything. So Ren Yi didn’t intend to tell Gong Yingxian yet, lest he get his hopes up for nothing.
Gong Yingxian closed his eyes and said wearily, “I feel like I’m dreaming. After all these years, I was already close to giving up. I never thought a clue would appear at this moment.”
“Good and evil have their consequences. This proves that you were destined to bring the killer to justice.”
“I don’t care whether I can bring him to justice.” Gong Yingxian’s gaze turned ice-cold. “As long as I find him, even if the statute of limitations has expired, I’ll kill him with my own hands.”
Ren Yi fell silent.
“I’ve imagined it countless times.” Gong Yingxian interlaced his fingers and pressed them against his forehead, his mouth uttering words that sent a chill through the air. “Douse him in gasoline, set him on fire, then stand there and listen to him scream, watch him burn alive, just like he did to my family.”
“You’re a police officer now. I believe that even if he stood right in front of you, you wouldn’t do that. Because he isn’t simply an arsonist, right?” Ren Yi said quietly. “What happened to your family is connected to the Baosheng Chemical Plant explosion, isn’t it?”
Gong Yingxian’s shoulders trembled. After a long while, he finally said hoarsely, “You guessed right. My father was just a scapegoat. I not only have to find the person who set the fire, I also have to find the person who ordered him to do it. I want revenge, and I also want to clear my father’s name.”
Ren Yi’s brows drew tightly together. It was difficult to imagine how many cruel conspiracies had been buried within that accident all those years ago. Even more unexpected was the fact that while investigating an arson case that seemed completely unrelated, they had accidentally found a clue whose trail had been severed for so long.
Everything was destined.
Ren Yi was somewhat worried about Gong Yingxian’s state. “I’ll take you home. You’re too tired today. Don’t think about anything. Go back and get some proper rest.”
Gong Yingxian shook his head and said quietly, “We made plans.”
“What?”
Gong Yingxian raised his arm and showed Ren Yi his wristwatch.
Ren Yi glanced at it. “Uh, it looks pretty good. Looks expensive.”
“It’s not midnight yet. I’m supposed to go to your place today.” Gong Yingxian didn’t want to go home at all right now. He wanted Ren Yi to stay with him.
Ren Yi’s heart gave a violent thump, and he blurted out, “Sure.”
He regretted it a little as soon as he said it. That “sure” had sounded far too eager, but he really couldn’t help himself.
When you like someone, you simply can’t help it.
That was why he kept finding all kinds of excuses to see Gong Yingxian, and no matter how many times he tried to suppress his feelings, it was futile.
He was the one who had chickened out. He knew Gong Yingxian didn’t feel that way about him. From the moment he admitted his own feelings, he had already lost. People had an instinct to seek benefits and avoid harm; if they had a choice, no one would willingly put themselves in such a situation.
But now, it was no longer up to him.
The two of them left the precinct and drove to Ren Yi’s home.
As soon as he entered, Gong Yingxian seriously looked around.
Ren Yi smiled. “Has it been a long time since you lived in a place this small?”
“I’ve never lived in one,” Gong Yingxian answered honestly.
“Then today, Young Master Gong gets to experience ordinary life.”
“This is where you live.” Gong Yingxian looked around the perfectly ordinary apartment, yet he felt an inexplicable sense of familiarity and peace. It was different from the countless other homes out there. Perhaps it was because Ren Yi’s presence was everywhere.
“I lived here for a few years. After my dad got sick, I moved back to the old house. It’s closer to the squad.” Ren Yi said, “Uncle Sheng prepared everything you need. The sheets and bedding were brought over from your place. Oh, and your precious pillow, too.”
Gong Yingxian’s expression immediately became a little unnatural. He took off his coat and hung it on the coat rack, deliberately turning away. “That pillow is just comfortable. What’s so strange about that?”
“Really? What’s so special about this pillow that it’s worth trying?” Ren Yi asked casually. “Let me sleep on it sometime.”
Gong Yingxian froze for a moment. “You want my pillow?”
Ren Yi was taking off his coat and putting on an apron. He grinned. “You’ve got fewer than thirty left, and you need them for the rest of your life. I wouldn’t dare take one.”
Gong Yingxian seemed to relax.
He would absolutely never have given his pillow to anyone else. But if Ren Yi wanted it, perhaps he…
“Why don’t you sit and watch some TV? I’ll go make dinner. You’re hungry, right? We haven’t eaten anything since this afternoon.”
“It’s too late. Just eat the boxed meal in my car.”
“How could I do that? You came to my home as a guest. How could I serve you a boxed meal? It’s fine. I’ve already prepared most of the ingredients. Give me an hour, okay?”
While Ren Yi busied himself in the kitchen, Gong Yingxian sat motionless on the sofa. His mind was a complete mess, as though he were still trapped by the hooded man’s words and unable to break free. He slapped his forehead hard and realized that his emotions had gone through far too many ups and downs today. He was in no condition to think. What he needed now was food to replenish his energy and a good night’s sleep.
The sound of stir-frying came from the kitchen, and waves of delicious aromas drifted out through the doorway.
Gong Yingxian had never been one to involve himself with the ordinary bustle of cooking and household life. His memories of such things were too painful, and he had spent his entire life desperately avoiding them. But after undergoing one involuntary “desensitization treatment” after another, his tolerance had indeed improved. He was much better than before.
At this very moment, he actually wanted to see what Ren Yi was doing in the kitchen. This desire even overpowered his aversion to the sights and smells of cooking.
He hesitated for a long time before getting up and walking toward the kitchen.
When he pushed open the kitchen door, a wave of heat spread toward him. Gong Yingxian looked at the vigorous flames beneath the gas stove and the smoke rising from the wok, and his body stiffened slightly.
Ren Yi looked at him in surprise. “What’s wrong?”
“Just looking,” Gong Yingxian said expressionlessly.
“You probably don’t want to look at this.” Ren Yi spoke with concern.
“I’m not so afraid of a little stove flame.” Gong Yingxian looked at Ren Yi standing there in his apron, dressed in the comfortable clothes of home, and an inexplicable warmth welled up inside him. “What are you making?”
“This is beef stewed with potatoes.” Ren Yi pointed at the pot nearby. “And this is winter melon soup.”
Gong Yingxian frowned.
“Don’t worry. I also prepared a few cold dishes, in case you don’t eat these.” Ren Yi smiled. “If you really want to watch, go change your clothes first. Otherwise, your suit will smell like smoke.”
“Oh.”
Gong Yingxian turned around to change.
After a while, he came back. He had changed into dark-green plaid loungewear and was leaning against the kitchen doorway, quietly watching Ren Yi bustle around.
Whether Ren Yi turned sideways or turned his back, he could feel Gong Yingxian’s gaze on him. Seeing him dressed in loungewear, standing in his kitchen, was almost as if…the two of them lived together.
When Ren Yi turned around, he couldn’t help grinning.
Even though he was starving, he still wished he could make this meal more slowly, even slower, so that this moment could last a little longer.
How beautiful these simple, ordinary moments of domestic life were.