“…Don’t tease me recklessly, or I can’t guarantee that I’ll still be able to be ‘gentle.’”
Xiao warned him hoarsely.
Xia Lansi blinked and put on an innocent expression.
The scales in his mind began weighing things. He still had work to do tomorrow morning.
He finally behaved himself a little more and let Xiao take over.
Xiao’s fingers seemed to have something on them. He lifted one of Xia Lansi’s legs, gently rubbing around the entrance several times before slowly pushing a finger inside.
“…!”
It was Xia Lansi’s first time experiencing the sensation of being penetrated, and he couldn’t help drawing in a sharp breath, his eyelashes trembling uncontrollably.
A strange sensation came in waves from his lower body.
It wasn’t particularly painful. There was some fullness, and he could clearly feel that Xiao was inside him.
Xiao slowly moved his finger in and out while watching Xia Lansi’s expression. After giving him some time to adjust, he inserted a second finger.
This time, Xia Lansi felt even more clearly that this man was entering him.
He parted his lips and breathed lightly, his gaze drifting toward Xiao before moving downward.
Earlier, through his trousers, he had already felt that astonishingly hot hardness beneath them.
His heart, which had managed to behave itself for less than half a moment, began stirring again.
Those pale-red eyes lifted slightly, gazing intently into Xiao’s.
There was a hint of tenderness in that gaze, almost like an invitation.
He unconsciously pressed his lips together. Seeing this, Xiao’s Adam’s apple involuntarily moved.
The price Xia Lansi paid for playing with fire was having the fingers thrust deeply inside him.
Xiao’s long, sharply jointed fingers deliberately moved and lightly teased inside him.
A tingling, aching sensation unlike anything before surged through his body, making Xia Lansi nearly cry out.
He quickly covered his mouth with his hand to keep the sound from escaping.
Xiao withdrew his fingers in satisfaction and removed his underwear.
Tonight, he didn’t want to play the role of a dutiful gatekeeper.
He only wanted to be an ordinary man.
Now that nothing stood between Xia Lansi and that massive length, Xia Lansi couldn’t help staring for a moment when he saw it.
From Xiao’s actions just now, he already understood what was coming next.
He seriously wondered whether that thing could actually… fit inside.
It was like a massive beast with its head raised, distinct veins bulging along its shaft, its tip swollen dark red with overwhelming desire.
But Xia Lansi wanted all of Xiao.
He wanted to accept every part of this man completely.
Because this was the person he had spent ten years… no, countless lifetimes searching for.
He took a deep breath and said to Xiao, “You… go ahead.”
Xiao’s eyes widened slightly as he looked at Xia Lansi lying on the bed.
Snow-white strands of hair were scattered across the bedding. His inner garment still clung loosely to his slender body, no longer serving much purpose as a covering, yet somehow making him even more alluring.
Xiao tenderly caressed his flat lower abdomen before his hand traveled to the inside of his thigh and gently lifted it.
When he rubbed against the entrance with the tip of his erection, Xia Lansi still felt a trace of panic.
Xiao gently pecked his lips, his voice lower and raspier than usual as he soothed him.
“Don’t be afraid. Relax. It might feel uncomfortable at first, but you’ll gradually get used to it.”
Xiao scattered soft kisses across his face, lips, and body, like a butterfly lightly brushing against the heart of a flower.
His gentleness gradually allowed Xia Lansi to relax.
But below, it was an entirely different scene.
The thick shaft pressed against the entrance, stretching it open before slowly entering.
Xia Lansi felt as though he were being torn apart by force. It was completely different from the sensation of being explored by fingers just moments ago.
Even though they had prepared thoroughly, it still hurt.
Tears instantly welled in his eyes and slipped down as his eyelashes trembled.
“Are you all right? Does it hurt badly?”
Xiao immediately stopped and asked worriedly.
His voice, however, was hoarse.
Xia Lansi shook his head, a smile naturally appearing on his lips.
“…It doesn’t hurt. You… continue.”
He could hear the restraint and longing in Xiao’s voice.
Xiao had always cared about his feelings. He knew that during those lost years, the two of them had shared a bed for countless nights, yet Xiao still respected the wishes and feelings of the present-day Xia Lansi, giving him the utmost care.
How could this small amount of pain compare with everything Xiao himself had lost?
As though soothing him, Xiao gently stroked the crown of his head with a warm hand.
“Don’t rush. Take it slowly…”
His movements became extremely gentle and cautious.
But the scorching, tightly enveloping walls around him made Xia Lansi feel even more unbearably full, as though he were about to split apart.
It was almost impossible for him to keep himself under control.
Yet the slow movements instead made Xia Lansi even more sensitive, allowing him to clearly feel the swollen veins rubbing again and again against the delicate inner walls.
At this moment, Xiao reached out with one hand and once again grasped Xia Lansi’s already-aroused erection, neither too hard nor too gently, moving along with the rhythm.
Under such an assault, Xia Lansi’s consciousness quickly began to dissolve.
A layer of moisture spread across his pale-red eyes, leaving them slightly unfocused.
“Ah… Xiao…”
His voice sounded almost coy, as though begging for mercy, yet also as though asking for more.
The sound was unbearably seductive.
It finally made Xiao lose the last of his restraint, and he quickened his pace.
“Huaiyu…”
He called his name again and again, like a sigh.
There was deep longing in his voice, along with an almost imperceptible sorrow.
Amid the haze, Xia Lansi managed to recover a sliver of awareness. He wrapped his arms around the back of Xiao’s neck and kissed him.
Both of them were lost in chaos—their breathing, their heartbeats, even their thoughts.
Everything had been thrown into disarray and slipped beyond their control.
But now, they no longer cared about anything.
The only thing they cared about was the person before them.
Reality, propriety, schemes—all of it had been cast aside.
At this moment, there was only overwhelming love and scorching heartbeats.
At some point, the rain outside grew heavier.
Along with the first thunderclap of spring, it drowned out the sounds of their breathing and the intimate noises from inside the room.
“Huaiyu…” Xiao’s eyelashes trembled slightly, his voice terribly hoarse. “I want to finish inside you… may I?”
Xia Lansi could no longer think clearly enough to understand the question, but he still instinctively answered, “…Okay.”
He thought that even if Xiao asked for his life, this would probably still be his answer.
In the end, Xiao released himself inside that slender body, which was nevertheless filled with such complete acceptance of him. His entire body trembled, as though he wanted to pour all of his love into the deepest part of this body.
Xia Lansi seemed to feel something, and an overwhelming wave of satisfaction and tingling pleasure swept over him. He climaxed once more in Xiao’s hand.
His entire body went limp and weak, his mind hazy.
Xiao whispered beside his ear, “…Did it feel good?”
His voice was husky in the aftermath.
He looked at Xia Lansi’s reddened eyes, his gaze filled with tenderness.
Xia Lansi slowly opened his eyes.
As their blurred visions met, he immediately found himself looking into Xiao’s eyes from inches away.
Those black eyes, normally as still and cold as a lifeless abyss, were astonishingly hot at this moment. His reflection was clearly visible in them, surrounded by lingering, thick desire and a rare sense of satisfaction.
“…It felt good.”
His voice was equally hoarse, soft as a sigh.
Half reclining in Xiao’s arms, he gradually calmed his hurried breathing. His scattered consciousness slowly returned like the tide receding from shore.
The room still retained the lingering heat of their intimacy, yet he had no intention of moving. He simply remained quietly pressed against that solid, warm chest.
The thunder outside intertwined with the steady, still-rapid beating of Xiao’s heart.
This intimacy, in which they seemed to have melted their very flesh and blood together, gave him the illusion that time had finally become peaceful and still.
But Xia Lansi knew better than anyone that this brief moment of pleasure and peace had ultimately been stolen from fate.
His gaze lowered slightly, falling on Xiao’s wrist where strange black markings coiled around it.
Xiao had never explained what this striking totem meant.
But Xia Lansi had already noticed that Xiao, Xiao Yuan, and Su Muchen were all guarding the same secret—a secret concerning him.
What truly confirmed his suspicion was the argument between Su Muchen and Xiao, when Su Muchen had blurted out a warning before abruptly stopping:
“You can’t stay here any longer! The Gate will—”
Then there was Xiao Yuan’s abnormal and resolute attitude after reading The Guichen Records, when he demanded that Su Muchen take the ancient book back to the modern world.
Xia Lansi could almost piece together the outline of the truth.
Xiao perhaps could not remain in this world for very long at all.
He did not possess the freedom that the Gate Master and the Gate Key had to travel between the two worlds.
Otherwise, after all these long years, he would not have been unable to come to Dasheng.
Xia Lansi’s gaze remained fixed on the black markings around Xiao’s wrist.
Compared with when he had first seen them, the markings seemed to have spread slightly farther outward.
The difference was extremely subtle, but there was no way he could have mistaken it.
They looked almost like some kind of curse.
Or perhaps an even more terrifying countdown.
Xia Lansi slowly closed his eyes, hiding all the sorrow in them.
Since they had chosen to keep it from him because they did not want him to worry, then he… would temporarily pretend he knew nothing and accompany them in carrying this act through to the end.
Xiao said nothing.
He merely lowered his head and rested his chin lightly against the crown of Xia Lansi’s head.
His fingertips tenderly combed through Xia Lansi’s loose hair again and again.
Then he picked up a strand of snow-white hair and, almost obsessively, wound it around his fingers again and again.
There was a barely perceptible tremor in his grip, as though by holding on tightly enough, he could bind this person to his side forever and escape the ravages of fate.
“Xiao…”
A very soft call came from his arms.
Xia Lansi slowly lifted his eyelashes.
Those red eyes that usually concealed calculations were completely unguarded now, gazing steadily at him.
He reached out, his warm fingertips sliding inch by inch between Xiao’s fingers until their hands were tightly intertwined.
He thought that there were too many variables in the future.
There were some things he no longer wanted to wait even a moment to say.
“I love you.”
Xia Lansi’s voice was slightly hoarse, but filled with absolute certainty.
“It isn’t because you saved me during that snowstorm. Even before I knew you were the person from ten years ago… I had already fallen for you.”
Feeling Xiao’s fingers suddenly stiffen, Xia Lansi tightened his grip and continued softly:
“So when I initially thought you weren’t that person, I wasn’t disappointed. If anything, it made me even more certain that my desire to approach you and my longing for you had never been because I wanted to repay a debt of gratitude.”
“I wrote those letters… simply because I was greedy. I wanted to know everything about you. I wanted to step into your world.”
This completely unreserved confession stirred enormous waves in Xiao’s heart, which had been as still as dead water.
Surprise, emotion, and a profound love almost capable of drowning a person surged violently through his cold, abyss-like eyes.
So all those probing words and letters had never been bargaining chips in the little fox’s hands.
They had been a sincere heart he had carefully held out.
Xia Lansi had truly been desperately trying to understand him.
Xiao’s Adam’s apple moved with difficulty.
His voice was terribly hoarse.
“…What about now?”
Xia Lansi suddenly smiled.
The smile was gentle to the extreme, like spring wind melting snow.
“Now, I think I’m the luckiest person in the world.”
He lifted his head, his gaze tenderly tracing Xiao’s stern features, crystalline moisture shimmering in his eyes.
“Because Heaven actually granted the two greatest impossible wishes I’ve ever had in this life all at once.”
“The god I looked up to on that snowy night ten years ago, and the man I hopelessly fell in love with ten years later… turned out to be the same person all along.”
Ten years had not erased a single fragment of that memory.
His heart had already been lost to this person on that snowy night ten years ago.
Fortunately, he did not have to tear himself apart between gratitude and love.
Because from beginning to end, his soul had belonged to only one person.
The moment those words fell, Xiao could no longer maintain his outward composure.
Throughout all these long years, no one had ever offered him such pure and passionate salvation.
The dark fire that had finally quieted erupted once more, spreading like a wildfire. An uncontrollable possessiveness churned through his blood.
He had wanted to treat this frail, ailing body with the utmost gentleness.
But in front of Xia Lansi, even a single glance, a whispered word, or an unguarded smile was enough to completely destroy his self-control.
“Huaiyu.”
Xiao let out a low growl and pressed their intertwined hands firmly into the soft bedding.
He covered Xia Lansi’s body, sealing all the words left unspoken, along with the love that threatened to consume them both, within their hurried and feverish kisses.
He lifted Xia Lansi’s frail body and entered him deeply.
After their earlier intimacy, there was almost no resistance this time, and he sank completely inside.
Xia Lansi could barely endure it, his brows knitting together.
He instinctively raised a hand against Xiao’s chest, trying to resist the force of his advance.
“Too… deep… mm…”
He managed to speak with difficulty.
But his voice and those words only made it harder for Xiao to suppress the primitive desire buried deep within him.
At that moment, he only wanted to press Xia Lansi firmly beneath him and surrender completely to his desire, pouring all of his love into that pure body.
But ultimately, amid the frenzy, he managed to recover a trace of tenderness.
He slowed his movements, drawing back and entering again with loving care, alternating between shallow and deep.
“My… little snow spirit…” he murmured.
Xia Lansi slowly opened his eyes.
In the distant past, it seemed that someone had once called him that in the darkness.
The voice had been filled with longing.
Like someone reluctant to part.
Amid the passionate entanglement, accompanied by the man’s growls and ragged breathing, scorching heat was released into his body once again.
Both of them were drenched in sweat and the remnants of their intimacy, exhausted as they collapsed onto the bed and held each other close.
After resting together for a while, Xiao gently released him and got up to put on his clothes.
When Xia Lansi opened his eyes, he saw the stunning red peony-like mark on Xiao’s left back, vivid enough to seem as though blood might drip from it.
He couldn’t help remembering that ten years ago, the last thing he had seen had been a similar sight.
Back then, after Xiao had turned and left, ten years passed before he ever returned.
Without realizing it, Xia Lansi reached out and caught Xiao by the sleeve.
Feeling himself being pulled, Xiao turned around and saw Xia Lansi clutching the edge of his sleeve.
He smiled softly.
“I’m only going to get some water.”
Only then did Xia Lansi let go.
Xiao put on his outer robe and walked to the door, quietly instructing the servants waiting nearby to prepare hot water.
Before long, the servants lowered their heads and brought over hot water and clean cloths.
They did not dare look directly at him.
The sounds from inside the room earlier, combined with the request for hot water, were enough to explain everything.
“Leave.”
Xiao took the copper basin and turned back toward the inner room.
He wrung out the warm cloth and gently, carefully wiped away the sticky sweat and traces from Xia Lansi’s body, his gaze falling upon the many new marks scattered across that snow-white skin.
He then helped him change into clean sleeping clothes.
After settling him back into the soft bed, Xiao carefully tucked every corner of the covers around him.
Finally, he bent down and pressed a kiss to Xia Lansi’s slightly cool forehead, filled with endless tenderness and preciousness.
“Sleep peacefully. I’ll handle the remaining affairs.”
“…Okay.”
Xia Lansi’s eyes were half closed, his voice heavy with exhaustion.
He truly could not lift even a single finger anymore.
This already frail body was even weaker than he had imagined. After all that exertion, he could barely move.
Now that the heat of passion had faded, an indescribable soreness spread through every limb.
His final thought before falling asleep was an exasperated, bitter smile.
How am I supposed to drag this body to tomorrow morning’s meeting and pretend that nothing happened?
The night rain continued without pause, striking the window lattice with a muffled sound and gradually bringing the chill of early autumn into the room.
The candlelight in the study burned quietly.
Xiao sat at the desk reviewing several volumes of official documents, but his mind was restless.
In the end, he simply set down his vermilion brush, lightened his footsteps, and returned to the inner room once more.
On the bed lay the person he had poured everything into loving, now sleeping peacefully and completely defenseless.
Xiao stood quietly beside the bed.
Those eyes that were usually capable of calculating every possible move were now filled with an affection and reluctance so deep they seemed impossible to dissolve.
The question Xiao Yuan had once asked him—
“What if one day, Huaiyu is the only one left?”
At this moment, it was like a poisoned barb driven viciously into his heart, pulling at a tearing pain with every breath.
He did not know.
After the Gate was reopened, would the world of the past be completely annihilated, or would it continue struggling to survive along another parallel river of time?
The ancient books held no answer.
Nor had the Gate ever given him one.
If it was the former, then everything would end.
But if it was the latter…
Then in those worlds where he had been forcibly made to disappear, what would Xia Lansi, left behind alone, eventually do?
He did not dare think about it.
The cruelest farewell in this world was to leave someone behind with the irresponsible words, “Live well.”
Xiao could not say them.
Because over the long years, he had personally tasted what it meant to “live alone in this world after losing the person you love.”
It was a punishment ten thousand times more painful than being slowly cut apart.
Even the word despair was insufficient to describe the devastation of that pain.
If the blade of fate would eventually fall…
If one day he was destined to be forcibly torn away from this world by the Gate once again…
Then besides endless sorrow and loneliness, what could he possibly leave Huaiyu?
Xiao slowly sat down beside the bed.
Like a drowning man, he gently took Xia Lansi’s hand where it lay outside the covers.
He remained there in the pitch-black rainy night, listening to the merciless thunder in the distance.
He stayed awake throughout the entire night, allowing that unsolvable mystery to churn endlessly through his mind until the eastern sky gradually began to pale.