After going through life and death together, he had finally seen things clearly. These two, master and disciple, simply could not be separated.
All he hoped was that Lanxing could be happy. As Zhixi’s only friend, this was the last thing he could do for him.
When the two of them had fallen out of the formation together, he had caught both of them at once. At that moment, he had already known that Zhixi would never have to suffer even the slightest hardship at Lanxing’s hands from then on.
Luo Cheng’an shook his head. “His soul is too badly shattered. He needs time to recover. If you really can’t wait, then force your love on him.”
……………..
What kind of thing was that to say?!
How could he say something like that?!
“I’m not that much of a beast.”
“Are you not?” Luo Cheng’an gave Xi Yu a sidelong glance. “You look like you’re about to devour him whole.”
Xi Yu paused before asking, “Is it that obvious?”
Luo Cheng’an sprang up from the sofa, glared at Xi Yu, and turned to leave without another word.
Xi Yu gave an awkward smile. As soon as the door closed, he rushed to the bed and wrapped his arms around the sleeping Lu Zhixing, letting out a satisfied sigh.
He had finally gotten to hold him.
Xi Yu’s fingertips trembled slightly as they curled around Lu Zhixing’s waist. Then he leaned down and pressed his lips to Lu Zhixing’s.
He had lived for so long, going from demon to god and then being reborn as a human. It felt like he had lived through several lifetimes, yet the number of times he had kissed someone could be counted on one hand.
Xi Yu had no particular technique. He simply wanted to be close to Lu Zhixing, to feel his breathing and heartbeat.
Keeping his lips against Lu Zhixing’s, Xi Yu raised a hand and gently caressed the cheek that still bore the mark of a slap. He murmured, “You poor little thing. Why can’t you ever behave?”
No matter how much he tried to teach him, he never learned.
He would rather have Lu Zhixing hate him than let him die.
He would rather disappear himself than let Lu Zhixing come to harm.
Perhaps Zhixi was pure and gentle, with no desires or demands.
But his love was raw and burning hot.
Xi Yu couldn’t describe what it felt like to be loved by Zhixi in such a way. But he knew that from now on, he would never be able to refuse any request Zhixi made.
Zhixi wanted him. Zhixi’s desire was him.
Gentle kisses fell repeatedly on the corners of Lu Zhixing’s lips, his ears, the space between his brows, and his cheeks.
Xi Yu’s lips traced Lu Zhixing’s features as lightly as a dragonfly skimming the surface of water.
Lu Zhixing had paid the most devastating price to secure the lives they now shared.
Xi Yu buried his face against the side of Lu Zhixing’s neck, his nose stinging.
Even after he had finally gathered this person into his arms, the fear remained boundless.
He didn’t dare imagine what would have happened if something had gone wrong when he extracted his divine bone, or if he had failed to block that final attack inside the execution formation.
He ached for all the suffering Zhixi had endured for his sake.
“Hurry up and remember,” Xi Yu sighed.
Once Lu Zhixing remembered everything, they would still have to finish what they had left undone at Wutong Village.
Everything that had happened during this period had also left its own shadow in Xi Yu’s heart.
He desperately wanted to make Zhixi his, hoping that would finally erase the unease that had lingered in his chest and refused to fade.
*
Early the next morning, Xi Yu was awakened by a scream. He sat up in confusion.
Lu Zhixing was standing against the wall, watching Xi Yu warily. The moment he saw Xi Yu get out of bed, he hurriedly shouted, “Don’t come any closer!”
Xi Yu stopped in his tracks. Seeing the guarded expression on Lu Zhixing’s face made his heart ache for a moment.
Xi Yu regretted it so much that he wanted to chop off his own hand.
“I won’t come over.” Xi Yu returned to the bedside and sat down. “Don’t be afraid.”
Lu Zhixing blinked and looked at Xi Yu for two seconds before suddenly dashing toward the door.
Just as he was about to open it, Luo Cheng’an pushed the door open and walked in.
Lu Zhixing’s eyes immediately lit up. “Brother Cheng’an!”
Xi Yu’s expression darkened slightly.
The difference in treatment was simply too obvious. When had Zhixi ever ignored him like this before?
Fortunately, the person Lu Zhixing was relying on now was Luo Cheng’an. If it had been anyone else, Xi Yu really would have been driven mad with jealousy.
Lu Zhixing didn’t notice Xi Yu’s displeasure. He grabbed Luo Cheng’an’s arm and said, “Hurry and take me away. I’m scared.”
Still shaken, Lu Zhixing glanced at Xi Yu out of the corner of his eye. That only made him even more frightened.
“Let’s go! Pretty Brother is going to hit someone again!”
Luo Cheng’an looked at Xi Yu with a half-smile. Xi Yu was so miserable that he didn’t even want to speak.
He had already spent a long time explaining himself the previous day. No matter how much he apologized, it was useless.
The truth was that he really had slapped Lu Zhixing, so there wasn’t much he could explain. He had repeatedly promised that he wouldn’t do it again, but Lu Zhixing wasn’t buying it.
“Didn’t you say you wanted to treat Pretty Brother to ice cream when he woke up?”
After bringing the two of them back and making sure neither had died, Luo Cheng’an had first stabilized Xi Yu’s primordial spirit before turning his attention to repairing Lu Zhixing’s soul.
Once Lu Zhixing woke up, Luo Cheng’an was exhausted, so he had simply tossed him into Xi Yu’s room.
Luo Cheng’an hadn’t expected Lu Zhixing to turn out like this either. Truthfully, he hadn’t treated Lu Zhixing particularly well before. But now that Lu Zhixing had become such a fool, he seemed unable to read other people’s expressions. Or perhaps it was because only the three of them remained in the Luo household, so Lu Zhixing had become especially clingy toward him.
While Xi Yu was still unconscious, Lu Zhixing spent half his time talking to Luo Cheng’an and the other half staring curiously at Xi Yu, constantly asking why Pretty Brother was still asleep.
Luo Cheng’an had only answered him a few times after getting fed up with the questions.
In theory, if Xi Yu hadn’t slapped Lu Zhixing and frightened him, Lu Zhixing should have been even more attached to Xi Yu by now.
Even after losing his memories, he hadn’t forgotten to call him “Pretty Brother.”
But now, “Pretty Brother” had become “Bad Brother.”
Lu Zhixing shook his head like a rattling drum. “No! He’s bad!”
The way Lu Zhixing spoke was completely at odds with his nearly six-foot-two frame.
Even though Xi Yu had repeatedly reminded himself that Lu Zhixing no longer recognized him, and that being hit had frightened him, all of which was Xi Yu’s own fault, hearing himself called “Bad Brother” still felt like taking an arrow straight through the chest.
“Take him away.” Xi Yu waved his hand. “My blood pressure is going up.”
Luo Cheng’an snickered and took a lollipop from his pocket. Handing it to Lu Zhixing, he said, “Go play. Bad Brother and I have something to discuss.”
Xi Yu had no magic at the moment, but that didn’t stop him from taking off his shoe and hurling it at Luo Cheng’an.
Luo Cheng’an dodged it, not forgetting to tease him. “If your little disciple saw you acting like this, he probably wouldn’t dare speak to you for three days.”
Xi Yu nearly choked on his own breath. “Hurry up and think of something to help me!”
The two of them had gone through life and death together and endured countless hardships to reach this point.
Losing their memories was one thing, but Xi Yu simply couldn’t bear a life where he couldn’t hold Lu Zhixing or kiss him.
Xi Yu wasn’t usually a lustful person, but right now, he could hardly control the urge to keep Lu Zhixing attached to himself at all times.
Luo Cheng’an sat down on the sofa, taking his time. “Lanxing, have you forgotten that I like you too? I’d be perfectly happy to see the two of you suffer through separation and hardship. And now you’re asking me to come up with a way to help you two be all lovey-dovey? That’s a little too cruel to me, don’t you think?”
Xi Yu looked at Luo Cheng’an, his bright, captivating eyes briefly freezing.
After a pause, he said, “Then… could you just bear with it?”
Luo Cheng’an laughed in exasperation. “Sure. Then you can bear with it too, Bad Brother.”
He emphasized the words “Bad Brother” so heavily that they practically scraped their way out between his teeth.
Seeing him like this, Xi Yu actually smiled. “You’ve become much more lively after spending time in the mortal world.”
Luo Cheng’an raised an eyebrow. “Have you finally realized how wonderful I am and decided to abandon Zhixi?”
In the Celestial Realm, Huaixi had been the Crown Prince. He couldn’t afford to make the slightest mistake in his words or actions. He had been like a cold object displayed behind glass.
Now, although he could be rather irritating, he seemed much more alive.
Perhaps Luo Cheng’an’s personality had initially been an act, but it hadn’t been entirely fake. Otherwise, he wouldn’t have been able to maintain the performance so perfectly that no one could detect the slightest abnormality.
……………………
“Luo Cheng’an” was more like a corner of Huaixi’s soul that had never been allowed to emerge.
But now that they had reached this point in the conversation, Xi Yu still decided to sit down and speak openly with Luo Cheng’an.
“As you’ve seen, Zhixi and I probably won’t be able to separate in this lifetime.” Xi Yu looked at Luo Cheng’an. “You’re my only friend, and I cherish you. But I can’t return your feelings.”
Luo Cheng’an fell silent for two seconds. “You seem to have changed quite a lot too. You wouldn’t have said something like that in the past.”
The Lanxing of old would never have said anything so sentimental. Words like “only” and “cherish” didn’t sound like things Lanxing would say.
His kindness had always been straightforward, expressed without words.
Perhaps because he already knew there was no possibility of being with Xi Yu, Luo Cheng’an didn’t feel particularly heartbroken upon hearing those words. There was only a faint ache in his chest, subtle but impossible to ignore.
Xi Yu propped his head up with one hand, looking rather relaxed. “Because I’ve realized that if you don’t say things out loud, other people can’t understand them.”
Everyone thinks differently. The same event can be interpreted in completely different ways.
Since that was the case, it was better to speak openly. Doing so could clear up a lot of misunderstandings.
Luo Cheng’an smiled, wearing the clear, serene expression that belonged to Huaixi. His voice trembled slightly as he said, “I won’t wish you two happiness.”
“But I’ll wish you happiness,” Xi Yu said. “Huaixi, may you find fulfillment. May you remain safe and well.”
Luo Cheng’an’s eyelashes trembled. “Should I thank you, or should I call you cruel?”
Xi Yu had insisted on telling him personally that he had absolutely no hope, even though Luo Cheng’an already knew the truth. He had still needed to hear it from Xi Yu’s own lips.
“Either is fine, as long as you’re happy.”
Luo Cheng’an’s eyes reddened slightly. “I’d be very happy if you two could just keep going like this.”
Xi Yu clenched his fists. “All right. No more of that.”
*
After Xi Yu had spoken openly with Luo Cheng’an that day, Luo Cheng’an remained downcast for several days.
Xi Yu also tried to be considerate of his feelings. Although there were times when he felt like throwing caution to the wind and simply getting Lu Zhixing into bed first, he still held back, mindful that Luo Cheng’an hadn’t had any particularly intimate interactions with Lu Zhixing.
Of course, a major reason was that Xi Yu currently had no magic. He simply couldn’t hold Lu Zhixing down.
It was already late autumn in City A.
Shen Qing and Luo Yuan, who had been away on a business trip for nearly a month, finally returned home.
“Is it really okay to stuff him in there?” Xi Yu asked, frowning as he looked at Lu Zhixing, who was curled up inside the wardrobe with his eyes sparkling, and then at Luo Cheng’an.