Chapter 101
“Learning from a master? How much can you learn in just two days? Our Song Ma is not just good at making dandan noodles!” Jin Fei said proudly. “She also makes amazing tea eggs!”
Su Bin asked, “Oh, so your family sells tea eggs?”
Allen interrupted Su Bin and Jin Fei’s conversation with a puzzled look and asked, “What are tea eggs?”
Su Bin and Jin Fei looked at each other, and Jin Fei suddenly looked at Allen and asked, “Do you understand Chinese?” Because they were speaking Chinese in those two sentences, and if Allen didn’t understand, he wouldn’t have asked only about “tea eggs.”
Jin Fei then remembered what Allen had said that day about Su Bin being his, so he looked at Su Bin and asked, “Did you teach him Chinese?”
Su Bin quickly shook his head and said, “No, I didn’t! Allen learned it on his own. He’s only been learning for two or three months, and he can even say ‘I wish you peace and happiness’… I think that’s about it?”
Jin Fei looked surprised at Allen, as if it was just as unbelievable as a Chinese emperor suddenly speaking in a London accent.
Allen said, “I’ve only heard someone mention ‘tea eggs,’ but I don’t understand what it means.”
“Oh, I see,” Jin Fei explained, “It’s eggs boiled with tea leaves. I’ll have Song Ma make you some tomorrow morning.”
Allen replied with a “Hmm” and then pressed his temples, saying, “I’m sorry, I have a bit of a headache. I’d like to rest for a while.”
Su Bin asked, “Headache? How come?”
Allen smiled and said, “Don’t worry, I always get a headache after flying. I just need to take some medicine.”
Upon hearing this, Jin Fei felt relieved and immediately got up to take the two of them to their guest room. The room had its own bathroom, and Jin Fei told Su Bin how to turn on the hot water and where to find drinking water before saying goodnight.
Once Jin Fei left, Allen lay down on the bed without even taking off his clothes.
Su Bin finished washing up and came out to find Allen lying with his eyes closed, looking like he had already fallen asleep. Su Bin’s heart suddenly raced, and he asked, “Allen, what’s wrong?”
Allen didn’t respond, so Su Bin asked again, “Did you take your medicine?”
Allen blinked once but still didn’t make a sound. Su Bin rushed over, knelt beside him, and touched his forehead and hand with concern. He said, “Are you okay? Where’s your medicine?” It didn’t look like a simple headache.
Allen weakly grabbed Su Bin’s hand and said, “Don’t talk, just stay with me for a while…”
The room had heating, so Su Bin took off his shoes and outer clothes, leaving only a sweater and sweatpants as he climbed into bed and snuggled up next to Allen.
Allen slowly hugged him, and his chin gently rested on Su Bin’s head.
Su Bin didn’t dare to move at all. After a while, he realized something was wrong. He struggled to sit up and found that Allen’s arm, which had been wrapped around him, was gradually slipping down onto the bed.
In a panic, Su Bin called Allen’s name and saw that he looked pale, his hands and feet were cold, and he was clearly not asleep but in a state of unconsciousness.
Su Bin jumped out of bed, rushed out of the room without even putting on his outer clothes, and shouted Jin Fei’s name.
Jin Fei came running when he heard the shout and saw Allen’s condition, his face turned pale. “What’s going on? Didn’t you say he would be fine after taking the medicine?”
Su Bin urgently said, “I don’t know, he lay down as soon as you left.”
Jin Fei quickly lifted Allen and carried him downstairs. He called the driver’s name, but Song Ma said the driver had gone to sleep. Jin Fei cursed under his breath and decided to drive himself.
Su Bin put on his coat, holding onto the unconscious Allen. He anxiously pinched Allen’s acupoint while sweating profusely.
Jin Fei drove as fast as he could to the nearest hospital. His friend at the hospital was already waiting, and they quickly took Allen to the emergency room.
Su Bin grabbed the sleeve of the doctor’s white coat and said, “My friend has hemophilia, and he just said he had a headache after flying.”
The doctor smiled kindly at him and said, “You can wait outside. We know what to do.”
Su Bin was really worried and kept looking in the direction of the emergency room. Jin Fei was still parking the car downstairs, and one of his friends patted Su Bin on the shoulder to comfort him and offered him a cigarette.
Su Bin took the cigarette but didn’t smoke it. He put it in his pocket. The friend said, “You and your friend are friends of Ah Fei in Country B, right?”
Su Bin took the cigarette but didn’t light it, putting it in his pocket instead. The friend continued, “That foreigner is really handsome, like he walked out of an oil painting.”
Su Bin nodded again, not knowing what to say. His mind was filled with Allen’s pale, unconscious face just moments ago, along with the three “forevers” they had exchanged when they made their bond a few days ago.
In fact, “forever” didn’t mean the same thing to everyone. For many people, it wasn’t a promise for the present moment but an expectation for the future.
That night, Su Bin agreed to give himself up to Allen and submit completely, not out of love or a willing surrender, but as an exchange. He exchanged his obedience for Allen’s promise, like a drug addict who, in the depths of his suffering, abandoned his rationality for drugs, not thinking about anything and drifting through life in a haze.
Allen’s oath and what he had done for him had made Su Bin feel equally moved and comforted, temporarily alleviating his pain. But it didn’t mean that Su Bin was completely devoted to him.
“Willing to believe” and “truly believing” were two different things. Even if they had gone through an intimate ritual, it couldn’t hide the fact that they had only known each other for a short time.
It wasn’t until Allen lost consciousness in front of him that Su Bin realized that the duration of this promise was different for himself and for Allen.
Allen had described his hemophilia to Su Bin, and Su Bin had some understanding of Allen’s perspective on life. He almost forgot that Allen was someone who might not have a tomorrow in the next second.
So what did “forever” mean to Allen? It meant not a hollow promise or a longing for the future, but the here and now, every minute and every second.
Su Bin covered his eyes and silently cursed, “Liar..”
Su Bin knew that Allen wasn’t a deceiver, but he had simplified everything in his mind. He thought that when Allen said “a lifetime,” it meant at least another fifty or sixty years, and he had plenty of time to choose whether to believe and whether to continue with Allen.
But Allen was different. When he made that decision, he really meant it. He wanted to be Su Bin’s master for the rest of his life.
Such an absolute oath was too heavy for Su Bin to bear.
Jin Fei returned, accompanied by Yang Chengzhe. When Yang Chengzhe saw Su Bin’s dejected appearance, he walked over and ruffled Su Bin’s hair, saying, “Silly kid.”
Upon hearing Yang Chengzhe’s voice, Su Bin suddenly felt like crying. “Cheng Ge…”
None of the three expected to meet in this situation. Jin Fei leaned against the wall and spoke with his friends in a subdued tone.
Yang Chengzhe asked Su Bin, “Are you worried about Allen?”
Su Bin nodded and asked, “Could something happen to him?” —What if something happened to him? What if he died?
Yang Chengzhe furrowed his brow and said, “Don’t worry, Allen has had this condition before. He’s lucky; nothing serious will happen.”
Su Bin asked, “He’s had this before?”
Yang Chengzhe replied, “Yes, it happened two years ago. It was also after he took a flight. He went to France and came back directly to the hospital. But at that time, I didn’t know he had hemophilia…”
Su Bin asked, “He can’t take flights?”
Yang Chengzhe clarified, “It’s not that he can’t fly, but he’s more prone to complications than regular people due to changes in air pressure, temperature fluctuations, and slight internal bleeding. His symptoms are magnified several times compared to an average person.”
Su Bin suddenly remembered that the night Allen found him, he had also complained of a headache, a sore throat, no appetite for food at dinner, and a pale complexion. Could it be that these were all symptoms of complications after a flight?
He had come to Beijing this time because he wanted to, and Allen had agreed, but he didn’t know that he had inadvertently caused Allen more suffering.
Su Bin felt extremely guilty. He had thought that Allen was coming to China just for him, but he didn’t realize that Allen was enduring much more than that.
Fortunately, they didn’t have to wait long in the emergency room. Someone came out and informed them that the patient had regained consciousness.
Everyone breathed a sigh of relief, and Su Bin quickly asked, “Doctor, what was the reason for his fainting?”
The doctor, who happened to be the head of the department that Su Bin had grabbed earlier, glanced at him and said, “Did he recently take a flight? It’s likely due to changes in air pressure, combined with temperature fluctuations, leading to reduced blood supply to the brain and minor internal bleeding. We’ve already administered clotting factors, and there shouldn’t be any major issues… Is your friend a doctor? He told us what medication he needed as soon as he woke up… Don’t worry, he just needs some rest, and he’ll improve in a couple of days.”
Su Bin remained silent, and he had no idea what to say. He had thought he was hiding his emotions well, but Allen had still noticed… He almost suspected that Allen could read his mind.
Allen raised his hand to gently stroke Su Bin’s forehead. “Were you worried about what happened just now?”
Su Bin was taken aback, thinking he had hidden it well, but Allen had still seen through him. Could Allen have some sort of mind-reading ability?
Allen continued, “You’re not saying anything. Is something on your mind?”
Su Bin remained silent, leaning his head against Allen’s chest, his thoughts in turmoil.
Allen let out a sigh. “Moo, I’m sorry.”
Su Bin nuzzled against him but still couldn’t find the words to speak.
At that moment, Allen suddenly said, “Are you worried… that I’ll suddenly leave you?”
Su Bin froze. Allen had hit the mark with that sentence! He knew that the “leave” in this context wasn’t a literal departure but death — complete disappearance, never to be seen or touched again. This was the power of fate, something no one could prevent.
Allen seemed to sense Su Bin’s fear and held him tightly, kissing his forehead. “Don’t be afraid, I won’t die.”
Su Bin trembled and pushed him away forcefully. He was getting agitated. “You can say you won’t die just like that!?”
Allen fell silent for a moment and said, “There’s also the possibility of accidents or disasters. I can’t guarantee that.”
Su Bin was so angry that he was trembling all over. He hated Allen’s tone and attitude. Why could Allen talk about this so calmly?
Allen looked at him steadily and asked, “Are you scared?”
Of course, Su Bin was scared! He was only twenty years old, and in his short twenty years of life, apart from his grandfather and Wangzai, no one had left him in such a cruel way…
Allen wasn’t in any life-threatening danger this time, but what about the next time? Or the time after that? He was like a fragile glass bottle, and one small accident could shatter him.
“You promised it was forever…” Su Bin didn’t even realize it, but his voice was choked with tears.
Allen looked at him and said slowly, “I did make that kind of preparation. I thought you had too. After all, neither of us is immortal.”
Su Bin thought, “What if you accidentally die? What if you have a slight bleed and it’s all over? What will I do?”
Allen said gently, “I can only do my best not to die while you’re alive, Mu. You have to believe me. I understand my own condition very well. I can’t promise you forty years, fifty years, or sixty years, but at least ten years. I will stay alive and protect you.”
“Who wants just ten years?” Su Bin blurted out in excitement. “That’s too short…”
He admitted that he was scared and hesitated. He admitted that he was selfish and greedy. He wasn’t prepared, yet he still expected others to keep their promises.
After hearing that, Allen’s body froze for a moment. After a long while, he sighed, and that sigh made Su Bin’s heart ache.
“Take your time to think about it. I’ll give you some time,” Allen said, and then he walked away. He went to the bathroom, and when he came back, he didn’t hug Su Bin but lay down with a little distance between them. He didn’t say goodnight and just went to sleep quietly.
Su Bin lay in bed, his heart in turmoil. They had spent several nights cuddling together, and he had grown accustomed to the warmth of Allen’s body. Sleeping alone felt so lonely, but he wasn’t so clingy that he couldn’t sleep without someone holding him. After the events of last night and his exhaustion, he soon drifted off to sleep.
He had a night of restless dreams, and Su Bin woke up groggily, only to find that Allen was no longer by his side.
He called out Allen’s name, but there was no response. As he got up, he suddenly saw his ID card, passport, bank cards, and cash on the writing desk. Su Bin’s heart sank. Why had Allen returned all these things to him? Was he angry? Did he want to end their relationship?
No… It seemed to be his own attitude from last night, his hesitation and retreat, that had hurt Allen.
Su Bin felt overwhelmingly guilty. He was about to soften up, but then he saw that Allen was actually standing up under the persuasion of an elderly Chinese lady. She was making eating gestures with her hands and speaking in Mandarin, even though she knew Allen couldn’t understand. Compared to her, Su Bin suddenly felt like a terrible person.
Allen had come to China because of him, and now he wasn’t feeling well. He could have stayed in Country B, eating turkey, drinking wine, and enjoying the service of others. But here he was in a foreign country, in an unfamiliar city… Even though he had friends, it was a completely different feeling. Su Bin could understand Allen’s current state, just like when he had gone to Country B for the first time. Although the people around him were friendly, the loneliness of being a stranger was indescribable.
Su Bin felt incredibly guilty. He wanted to apologize, but then he saw Allen standing up with the lady’s help and politely thanking her in Chinese.
Had he been convinced?
In comparison, Su Bin felt an even greater sense of loss. He had underestimated the persuasive power of a Chinese mother or Allen’s determination to be stubborn.
The elderly lady was feeling quite accomplished, smiling and leading Allen to the dining room. She personally served him a bowl of porridge and peeled a boiled egg for him, muttering, “These young people are so willful, forever children who never grow up…”
Su Bin: “…”
Under the personal supervision of the elderly lady, Allen finally had a complete breakfast, and Su Bin breathed a sigh of relief.
Just as they finished eating, Jin Fei came downstairs with a yawn. “You two are up so early! Allen, are you feeling better?”
Allen nodded and thanked him with a smile. “Please tell your housekeeper that the food was delicious, and the tea eggs were special.”
Jin Fei happily passed on the compliments, and the satisfied housekeeper busied herself. Jin Fei then asked, “Do you want to go out during the day? Su Bin and I can take you.”
Su Bin instinctively looked at Allen. In the past few days, Allen had made all the decisions about their outings.
Unexpectedly, Allen said to Jin Fei, “You take Michael out for a walk. I’m not feeling up to it as a patient.”
Su Bin: “…”
Allen nodded, “Let’s go. Let’s go eat breakfast first. I’ll make you some soup for lunch. You can have a good rest later. I have some English books in my room; I’ll get them for you in a while. You can read them if you’re bored… I’ll come back to pick you up in the car later.”
Allen: “Okay.”
