The next morning, Shu Changyu took sick leave from his post and did not attend the morning court session.
Before dawn, Madam Li got up and went to the ancestral hall. She knew that Shu Changyu’s health was poor, and she herself had not slept all night. When she got up the next morning, she looked considerably more haggard.
The maid who helped her with her makeup and hair could tell that something had happened from her appearance. But ever since the Third Young Master had returned last night, no one knew what had happened.
Hadn’t the Third Young Master returned safe and sound? What could the Madam possibly have to be so heartbroken about?
The maid did not dare say much and efficiently finished helping her get ready.
When Madam Li arrived, it was still dark. As soon as she entered the ancestral hall, she saw Shu Changyu kneeling in the very center.
The ancestral hall was completely empty, with only Shu Changyu kneeling in the middle. Beneath that row of dark memorial tablets, a row of candle flames flickered, stretching Shu Changyu’s shadow long behind him.
He knelt there with his back straight. He had been in poor health since childhood. Although he had grown tall, his shoulders and back were narrow. Kneeling so upright here, from a distance, he looked thin and gaunt.
Madam Li immediately burst into tears.
Her child… why did he have such a bitter fate?
In the past, whenever something happened at home, she would always be the first to tell General Shu every detail while he was far away in the northern lands. But today, she had sat at her desk with a brush in hand until midnight. Other than a sheet of paper covered in tears, she had not written a single word.
If General Shu learned of this matter, Madam Li believed that he would certainly return with his spear and personally kill this son of his.
Madam Li could not understand. Why would her son, who had always been so well-behaved and respectful, never overstepping the rules, commit such a treasonous act?
Although Shu Changyu had been raised by her side since childhood, he had caused her far less worry than Shu Changche, who was far away at the border. He had always restrained himself and observed propriety. He never did anything he should not do, and all the principles she needed to teach him, he already understood himself.
How had he now forgotten what it meant for feelings to arise but stop at propriety?
Whom could he have liked instead?
He could have liked a princess, or the daughter of another court official. At worst, he could have liked a commoner girl, or even a courtesan from a brothel…
Any of those would have been fine!
Why did it have to be a man—and an imperial prince who might one day inherit the throne?!
Although the Shu family was powerful and had rendered great meritorious service, the distinction between ruler and subject was the clearest of all. They were the blades and swords of the imperial court, able to be wielded by the emperor, but how could they… how could they lie beside the emperor on his pillow?
Madam Li could not understand how her most trouble-free child could do something that would tear the heavens apart.
She raised her hand and wiped away her tears before walking inside.
Hearing the footsteps, Shu Changyu did not move. He simply stared intently at the plaque above the ancestral hall bearing the words “An Entire Family of Loyal Martyrs.”
“Have you thought it through?”
Madam Li stood beside him, her voice calm and cold as she asked.
Shu Changyu did not raise his head. His eyes remained lowered. When he opened his mouth, his voice became stuck and hoarse in his throat, suddenly stopping before he could make a sound.
After a moment, he mechanically cleared his throat and said hoarsely, “Mother, I thought it through yesterday.”
“You still intend to continue being involved with the Second Prince?” Madam Li asked, raising her voice.
Shu Changyu paused, then gave a quiet hum of assent.
“Shu Changyu… Shu Changyu!” Madam Li’s voice trembled. She no longer called him by his courtesy name affectionately. “Mother truly never imagined… how did you become so selfish?!”
Shu Changyu did not answer.
“You only know that your father and I have no way of doing anything to you, don’t you?” Her voice trembled. “What about the Second Prince? How will His Majesty treat him? Have you thought about that? The Second Prince is only a child. He still knows nothing, and he follows only you in everything. How can you, for the sake of your own selfish desires, lead him down the wrong path like this?”
“He is only a half-grown child. How could he know what love is at this age? Shu Changyu, he does not understand, but you should! You can harm yourself if you wish. You can ruin the Shu family’s reputation if you wish. But why must you harm the Second Prince?!”
Shu Changyu listened mechanically, still not saying a word.
He had knelt in the cold wind all night, and a layer of frost had formed on his lips. He had already spent the entire previous day traveling, with his head dizzy and muddled, and then knelt through the entire night.
At this moment, his ears were buzzing and his vision was dizzy. He could not even hear clearly what Madam Li was saying.
Whatever she was saying, all that mattered was that he was not going to compromise with her.
So Shu Changyu knelt upright there, his eyes lowered, saying nothing.
Even he himself had not expected that he could be this determined.
For the first half of his life, he had obeyed every rule and teaching of the Shu family. The education he had received, everything he had been exposed to, had all taught him to restrain himself, observe propriety, be loyal to the emperor, and love his country.
But now, on the other side, there was Jing Mu.
His self-control had always been extraordinary, but after suppressing himself for so long, he still could not stop himself.
If even he could not stop himself, then no one could stop him anymore.
When it came to this matter, he was truly stubborn to an extraordinary degree.
This was the first time Madam Li had seen him refuse to yield whether through persuasion or force.
“If you have no intention of repenting, then kneel here,” Madam Li said coldly, raising her hand to wipe away another tear that had unwillingly fallen from her eyes.
“Yes.” Shu Changyu vaguely heard her this time and answered.
Madam Li’s eyes reddened. She flung her sleeve, turned around, and left.
She herself felt that what Shu Changyu had done was utterly wrong, but she did not know what to do. Even more, she did not dare tell the pillar of the household.
Only after Madam Li left did Shu Changyu slowly raise his head.
He focused his eyes.
The plaque bearing the words “An Entire Family of Loyal Martyrs” in front of him had, within his blurred vision, vaguely transformed into a blue-faced, fanged monster, opening its bloody maw directly toward him.
Shu Changyu had never imagined that after becoming enemies with the entire world and enemies with every civil and military official of the imperial court, there would one day come a time when he would become enemies with the entire Shu clan.
——
As soon as Madam Li left, a maid came to report that Prince Dunqin had arrived at the General’s Residence.
Madam Li’s face went pale, and she nearly failed to remain standing.
The maid was quick-witted and immediately reached out to support her.
“Prince… Prince Dunqin, did he say why he came?” she asked.
The maid hurriedly answered, “His Highness said that he heard the Third Young Master had fallen ill and had come especially to pay him a visit.”
Madam Li pressed her lips together and instructed, “Have him wait in the front hall for a moment. I will be there shortly.”
The maid hesitated. “But… Madam, the Third Young Master—”
Madam Li frowned. “You need not concern yourself with it.”
With that, she turned and walked toward the front hall.
By the time she arrived, Jing Mu was already waiting there. Beside him, Gu Lanrong, who still knew nothing about what had happened, was arranging for the maid to pour him tea.
Gu Lanrong was still smiling as she said, “Jingchen returned late yesterday, so I didn’t even get to see him. I imagine the long journey was too much for his body, so he’s resting at home for a couple of days. There shouldn’t be anything serious.”
When Madam Li entered, Jing Mu stood and bowed to her.
“Greetings, Madam Shu.”
Madam Li’s expression, however, was somewhat unusual. She lowered her eyes and glanced at the bowing Jing Mu before speaking with an unreadable expression.
“Your Highness, for you to bow to this old woman is too great an honor.”
After saying that, she raised her head and instructed Gu Lanrong, “If there is nothing else, go downstairs.”
Seeing that her expression was not quite right, Gu Lanrong did not linger. She hurriedly smiled, bowed to the two of them, and withdrew.
“Why has Your Highness come today?” Madam Li slowly sat down, picked up the teacup on the table, took a sip, and looked at him.
Jing Mu was stunned.
He had already begun missing Shu Changyu the moment he returned yesterday. Tossing and turning, he had been unable to sleep no matter what. He had finally endured until dawn, thinking that he would be able to see him at court, only to hear that he was ill.
Jing Mu had not suspected anything. He thought that the jolting along the road must have caused Shu Changyu to fall ill again. Shu Changyu had probably ordered the carriage to travel as quickly as possible so as not to delay his return, and therefore fallen ill again.
The more anxious Jing Mu became and the more desperately he wanted to see him, the more simply he decided to come directly to the General’s Residence.
He had originally thought that, having come without an invitation, he would certainly receive a scolding from Shu Changyu. But he had never expected Madam Li’s expression to change drastically and for her to treat him with such coldness.
Could something have happened?
Suspicious in his heart, he did not reveal it on his face and smiled as he said, “Madam Shu, this student heard today that the Grand Tutor had fallen ill. It should be because he became exhausted on the way back from his inspection tour. This student happened to have nothing to do today, so I came to visit him and put my mind at ease.”
As he spoke, Madam Li looked him up and down.
Madam Li had originally thought that he was merely a young boy, and that her son must have been bewitched to fall for him.
But she had never carefully examined him before. Now that she looked, she found that Jing Mu was first-rate in both appearance and bearing.
He was taller than others his age, and at a rough glance, he should already have grown somewhat taller than Shu Changyu. His features did not resemble Emperor Qian Ning, but rather resembled those of the late emperor, whose face had been firm and sharp.
Especially his brows and eyes—when he was not smiling, his presence was extremely intimidating.
“It’s nothing serious.” Madam Li came back to herself and replied淡ly. “Jingchen is still recuperating from his illness and cannot be exposed to the wind. I ask Your Highness to forgive me and return for now.”
Jing Mu could not help being stunned again.
The last time Shu Changyu had caught cold and become seriously ill, Madam Li had not stopped him from visiting. Why now…?
He simply asked, “Madam Shu, has something happened?”
Madam Li raised her eyes and looked at him, unexpectedly meeting his gaze.
Those eyes truly seemed to possess some kind of magic. When he looked straight at her like this, his eyes were deep as a pool, inexplicably making her feel somewhat guilty. In an instant, she looked away.
Jing Mu saw through it at a glance.
“Madam Shu?” he pressed.
“Nothing.” Madam Li lowered her eyes, then simply raised them again and looked straight at him. “Your Highness, I only ask that you be so kind as to keep some distance from Jingchen from now on. If you do that, you will already have done this old woman a great favor.”
Jing Mu was stunned. “Madam Shu…”
But Madam Li interrupted him and continued, “I already know about the matter between the two of you. Your Highness is a member of the imperial family, a noble descendant of Heaven, so naturally there is nothing for you to fear. But my Shu family cannot withstand this kind of upheaval, and Jingchen’s lifelong reputation is spotless. He cannot bear the name of a ‘favored courtier’ that will stink for ten thousand years.
“I have already memorialized His Majesty. Before long, I will have Jingchen go south to manage the river. I hope that after being separated for several years, Your Highness will also come to understand your identities and your relationship. By then, it will not be too late for the two of you to meet again.”
Upon hearing this, Jing Mu could not concern himself with anything else. He took two steps forward, his expression turning tense and cold.
“Madam Shu, the climate along the Yellow River in the south is harsh. Grand Tutor’s health—”
“Even if a child of my Shu family dies, he cannot become someone who brings disaster upon the imperial court, much less become a plaything of the imperial family.” Madam Li stood up with a cold expression. “See His Highness out.”
Just then, a young servant hurriedly ran inside.
“It’s bad, Old Madam!!”
He ran before Madam Li and knelt down, his voice trembling.
“Just now, I went to clean the ancestral hall and saw Third Young Master… Third Young Master has fainted inside!”
Author’s Note:
Today I called Mother Empress and talked about writing novels.
Mother Empress: “You should read more of the Report of the 19th National Congress, study the General Secretary’s instructions more carefully, and write according to the ideas of the Party and the country.”
Me: “???”
Mom, the Party and the country haven’t issued any instructions on how boys should fall in love with boys. _(:」∠)