Chapter 85

Su Bin’s heart resumed beating, and he gradually returned to his senses from that suffocating envy and resentment.

Allen… Allen… Allen…

The contrast between his father’s indifference and Allen’s attentiveness and tenderness filled Su Bin’s thoughts. He silently repeated Allen’s name, and there was a indescribable flavor in his heart.

After sitting in silence for a while, Su Bin looked up at his dad and tried to make his voice sound calm, “Dad, don’t you have anything else to say to me?”

His dad paused his chopsticks, called Su Bin’s nickname, sighed, and then fell silent again.

That one “Bin Bin” almost made Su Bin burst into tears, but he knew that his dad’s sigh had already given him an answer – there were no words.

Men, they often have nothing to say.

“When did you and Mom get divorced?” Su Bin asked in a different way. If they were divorced, they shouldn’t have kept it from him. There could be legal issues related to property distribution.

His dad hesitated and replied, “Last year.”

Last year? That was when he was in his second year of university. Unlike Chen Xiaotian’s excuse for not wanting to affect her college entrance exams, why… wait a minute!

Su Bin suddenly realized that last year he had just turned eighteen years old. He widened his eyes and looked at his dad in disbelief. Although he had long known that their marriage was practically nonexistent, he was still their son. Why didn’t they discuss this with him?

His dad seemed helpless too. He wasn’t good at expressing himself and didn’t know how to explain to Su Bin. But even if he were skilled at expression, because of his ex-wife, a thick emotional barrier existed between him and his son, making it impossible to cross… He could only do his best to provide for him materially.

Taking a gulp of wine, Su Bin’s dad looked at Su Bin and Allen and blandly said, “Eat.”

Everyone: “…”

Su Bin suddenly stood up and walked towards the door without looking back. Allen followed, catching up to him at the door and holding his wrist. In English, he said by his ear, “Wait for me downstairs, don’t wander around.”

Su Bin’s eyes turned red, and he wordlessly pouted, “…”

“Bin Bin!” Aunt Li hurriedly followed them outside, looking complex as she cast a glance at Allen and then turned to Su Bin, “Wait, Auntie has a few words to say to you.”

Su Bin shouted at her, “We have nothing to talk about!”

Aunt Li said with urgency, “Bin Bin, don’t blame your dad. He does care about you…”

Su Bin yelled at her, “He cares? I sent him text messages with my Chinese phone number, and he didn’t even notice that I was back. He only talks about money, is he treating me like a debt collector? He cares? How could he let me see you in this situation? I’m not a kid anymore! Why couldn’t he talk to me properly? He cares? He’s cooing over a child I don’t even know in front of me. He’s never cooed at me like that since I was a kid!” Su Bin’s yelling escalated, and he completely broke down. Tears poured out uncontrollably. He felt so wronged…

Aunt Li had a troubled expression, but she tried to explain, “Today is Xiu Xiu’s birthday. Originally, we were planning to celebrate elsewhere, but your dad changed the place without hesitation when he received your call… You see, he still cares about you.”

At this moment, Su Bin had lost all sense of rationality. He hysterically shouted, “Cares my ass! Don’t bring up Xiu Xiu to me! What the hell does she have to do with me?”

Aunt Li exclaimed, “Bin Bin, why are you talking like this? You’re already twenty. Why would you be mad at a two-year-old child?”

Su Bin covered his ears, “Get lost! I hate you all!”

Aunt Li said, “You… why are you still so immature!”

All Su Bin wanted now was for this annoying woman to leave, both her and her child, to take back the fatherly love that should have been rightfully his!

He rushed out of the restaurant, and Aunt Li persistently followed him outside, earnestly trying to persuade him. Su Bin was nearly driven crazy by her. If it weren’t for Allen’s advice not to run around, he would want to run to West Lake right now and jump in to end it all!

…

At that moment, Allen came downstairs. Su Bin exclaimed, “Thank goodness!” and rushed over to hug Allen, pleading, “Let’s go… I’ll take you to other places, we can eat somewhere else… not here…”

Allen looked at him and said, “Okay.”

—Thanks to those who endlessly hurt you, they pushed you into my arms.

The woman watched their departing figures, her eyes filled with an indescribable indifference… Su Bin, don’t blame your dad. He doesn’t owe you anything.

Escaping from that terrifying whirlpool and the noisy woman, Su Bin’s tightly wound spirit suddenly relaxed. He leaned against Allen with a vacant look in his eyes, not knowing what he was thinking.

Allen saw him like this and didn’t want to go anywhere else. He held Su Bin’s hand, led him to sit on the couch, made a “shush” gesture, and then called the hotel’s room service for a meal.

Su Bin’s mind was in chaos. He recalled how he had yelled and shouted so undignifiedly just moments ago. He felt so ugly… but at that time, he couldn’t control himself. If he hadn’t yelled, he would have gone crazy.

After a while, Allen returned, crouched in front of Su Bin, and asked, “Are you feeling better?”

“I’m sorry,” Su Bin said with a mournful face, “for making a fool of myself in front of you…”
He covered his eyes with his palms, not wanting Allen to see him in this state.

Allen gazed at him quietly for a moment, then slowly pried his hands away from his face. Just as he expected, the silly fool was crying again.

“What are you thinking?” Allen asked softly.

Su Bin moved his lips and murmured, “Am I really that pathetic?”

“Hmm?” Allen responded.

“If I’m not pathetic, then why do they treat me like this…” Su Bin mumbled to himself as if speaking to his own thoughts, “But I’ve tried so hard. I studied diligently, and I understood that they were busy, so I didn’t bother them… I admit, I used to be immature. I thought he didn’t care about me, so I was stubborn and didn’t want to talk to him… I always comforted myself, saying that compared to others, I was already quite lucky. At least he would give me money… After going to Country B, I worked part-time, learned to be independent. I wanted to make it up to him, so he wouldn’t have to work so hard. I wanted to tell him that I didn’t just want money, I also wanted him to care about me more, to be more concerned about me… Am I being too greedy?”

Allen embraced Su Bin tightly, gently stroking his back, but he remained silent.

“Or did I realize it too late, so he doesn’t want me anymore?” Su Bin nuzzled against Allen and murmured with tears in his eyes, “He already has a new family, a new child. He won’t value my kindness toward him anymore…”

Allen kissed his forehead, still not saying a word.

Suddenly, Su Bin remembered and asked, “Just now… why did you ask me to wait downstairs?”

Allen said, “Do you want to know?”

“You went to talk to my dad?” Su Bin thought for a moment. Wait, Allen doesn’t speak Chinese. Why would he talk to my dad? Could it be… he flipped the table on his behalf? No, that’s impossible. Allen wouldn’t do something like that!

Looking into Su Bin’s eyes, Allen smiled wryly, “I’m not telling you.”

Su Bin: “…” He’s not telling me again!!!

The doorbell rang, and Allen let go of him, getting up to answer the door. Su Bin suddenly felt empty all over, and he realized that he had unconsciously hugged Allen again! What should he do? He seemed to be getting more and more used to Allen’s embrace, and he didn’t want to let go at all…

Su Bin blushed and stared blankly on the couch, the corners of his eyes still moist with tears of grievance. Thinking about his dad, he was filled with bitterness and pain.

As his idol had said, find hope in despair. In Su Bin’s eyes, his only hope at this moment was Allen – Allen would never betray or abandon him. As long as he gave himself completely to Allen, it would be okay…

“Michael, come and eat something.”

Allen’s call interrupted Su Bin’s thoughts. Su Bin looked up and saw that a candlelit dinner had been set up in a corner of the room, though he didn’t know when. He walked over, looked at the exquisite dishes on the table, and was deeply moved.

“…Why are you so good to me?” Su Bin said with a guilty tone after sitting down.

“Listen, Michael, from now on, don’t apologize to me anymore. Today is a good day,” Allen said as he poured a glass of wine for him.

Yeah, it’s Christmas Eve tonight. That’s why Allen is being so gentle. But after tonight, will he stop being kind to me? But I don’t want the magic to disappear…

Su Bin raised his glass and apologized, “I’m sorry…”

I’m sorry for letting you experience such a terrible time in China. I’m sorry for making you prepare dinner on this special day…

Allen said, “Look, Michael, starting from now, you’re not allowed to say ‘I’m sorry’ anymore. Today is a good day.”

Su Bin immediately fell silent, clinked glasses with him, and said, “Merry Christmas Eve…”

Allen smiled at him and, using somewhat stiff Chinese, said word by word, “Su Bin, I wish you, peace, and happiness.”

Su Bin didn’t immediately catch on, stunned for two seconds before looking at Allen in amazement, “When… when did you learn?”

…I’m so touched!

Allen took a sip of wine, “A month ago.”

A month ago? He probably only learned a few phrases then, right? But Su Bin still exclaimed, “Your pronunciation is so good!”

Allen asked, “Which word? ‘Su’ or ‘Bin’?”

“Both… the pronunciation is really clear. Maybe it’s because my name starts with the same sounds. It’s not that difficult.”

Allen called his name again, “Su Bin…”

Su Bin wanted to cry and laugh at the same time, “Don’t call me that way.”

While cutting the steak, Allen asked with interest, “Why?”

“It just feels weird…” Su Bin didn’t dare to say – if you keep calling me that way, I might end up liking you…

Allen raised an eyebrow and repeated it several times, “Su Bin, Su Bin, Su Bin…”

Su Bin: “…” Oh no. I’m done for. Completely done for.

No earthquake or tsunami could describe Su Bin’s current emotions. Neither could words describe the upheaval in his heart. Even after the earth turned and the stars shifted, they couldn’t erase the beautifully charming smile of the person before him…

Allen ended with a laughing, “Silly, Su Bin.”

Su Bin: “…”

That’s right, I am silly. That’s why I’m still worrying about my unbearable past, struggling between liking and disliking, and only a complete fool like me would be willing to believe the things you say…

“What’s wrong?” Allen withdrew his gaze, laughed at himself, “Even if you look at me like that, I won’t kiss you. I’ve already said that…”

“I promise you,” Su Bin suddenly interrupted him.

Allen stopped, looking at Su Bin, “Have you thought it through?”

Su Bin met his gaze and confirmed, “I’ve decided… to give myself to you.”

—There’s no one else, no more, just Allen, Allen, Allen…

In that instant, emerald eyes blossomed with a unique brilliance. The young man slowly curled his lips, revealing a devilish and alluring smile.

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